Love Hate

Chapter 18

♡ 

The day of the funeral came.

I was leaving that night and my mother insisted I needed to get out of the area and go back to normal life, I would try and come to visit more often. 

I had too.

 I needed to get out but if I left I'd be leaving Noah and I didn't want that to happen.

I didn't wear all black, Noah would've wanted something bright. 

I wore a bright red coat over my short black skirt and stockings, a red ribbon in my hair.

I hadn't spoken for so long and my mothers tightening grip on my arm was numbingly painful.

I spoke at the funeral though, my voice sounding somewhat calm as I was trying not to say Noah was but Noah is.

The burial was the hardest, I stood behind everyone, my eyes closed.

I couldn't take this.

I placed the bright flowers on Noah's gravestone, looking away and walking swiftly beyond the crowd. 

I felt Louis' eyes on me but just focused on the neat tree line.

My parents spoke to everyone, thanking them for their condolences.

I made it past the last of the grave stones, the dull grey sky making the place cold.

I collapsed on my knees on the grass, tears streaming down my face. 

All my tears fell as I hugged myself as the sky began to drizzle.

My emotions came out, making me overwhelmed. 

"Amelie,"

said Louis soft voice from behind me.

I know the funeral had finished, people leaving as I had disappeared from sight.

I kept sobbing, clutching myself tightly.

I hated to be weak in front of Louis but my brother had just passed away.

I felt Louis sit next to me, my knee touching his.

He didn't say anything but he took my hand, lacing our fingers together.

I wondered if there was cameras but it felt...unpolished.

I squeezed his hand, gripping it tighter as I tried not to sob.

I started hicupping louder,my tears pouring faster.

Louis' arm wrapped around me, pulling me into his chest.

I didn't object, I needed comfort.

I soaked his shirt, sobbing as he just held my hand, smoothing my hair, resting his chin on my head.

I heard Louis' phone buzz a while later and I pulled away, biting my lip.

Louis had tears in his eyes too and I wanted to reach out and wipe away the ones on his cheeks.

 I probably looked ten times worse.

I put my hand on his face as he spoke on the phone, catching a tear with my thumb.

He looked at me as he felt my touch, no flinching or running, just an intense glance.

I blushed, pulling my hand down but Louis grabbed it, lacing it with his own.

"Harry, its not a good time,"

he said glancing at me.

I just stared at our hands, trying to slow my breathing.