Depression At It's Finest.

Just Great

I didn't want him to think that I couldn't stand being around him. I mean I can't, but he can't know that.
I got in the truck and hated how weird it felt sitting by the window. When him and I were driving around I'd always sit in the middle next to him, but that isn't happening.
"So what happened to you last night?", Tony questioned.
"Oh my um, phone died. Yeah."
"Ohhhh I see. Hey, why doesn't your boyfriend take you to school?"
"Well Damon isn't in school anymore he dropped out to get a full time job so he can support himself. He's probably asleep right now".
"I see.", He says in a judgmental voice.
"What's that supposed to mean?", I said defending my fiance.
His voice raised.
"Ireanna I don't like this guy. He's a tool. I don't like how at the theatre we were talking and he pulled you away!"
Tony has never yelled at me... it scared me..but I got angry and yelled back.
"Really?! You don't get to say that! He picked me up after you knocked me down! You hurt me more than you know! He actually cares about me!". Tony looked surprised. I'd never yelled at him either.
"Ireanna I... I.".
" You what?!".
"Ireanna I'm sorry. I didn't know I hurt you like that. I was a boy then. Now I'm different.".
"Tony please just drive."
Without another word he took off.

*Time skip to first period*

"Ireanna, Ireanna.".
I had fallen asleep in first period, but was woken by my best friend Amber.
"Dude you've been asleep like all period."
I lifted my head and she saw my face. "Rena have you been crying??".
It was more like she was demanding an answer than asking for one.
"Yeah, a little. It's no big deal.".
"No big deal?! Did Damon do this?! I'll beat his face in I swear!".
"Amber shut up, people are starring." I whisper yelled.
"Damon didn't do anything. I um... Actually had to get a ride to school from Tony this morning."
She looked pissed.
"Tony made you cry?! Where is the little prick?! I'll rip his head off!"
I couldn't help but laugh when the teacher spoke up 
"Ms. Flane, please quiet yourself. You are disturbing the sound of silence." (Don't judge my reference lol)
"Sorry Mrs. Thomas."
She sat down and quieted down to an acceptable level.
"Now tell me Rena, what did he say?" I remembered the entire argument this morning, as if it had only just happened.
"He called Damon a tool. He got angry because Damon kept me from talking to him."
"Really? After what he did? He's just a douche, I'm happy you got away from him when you did. I don't much like the upgrade to the player dropout, but it's better than Tony."
You see, Damon, when he was in school, was a bit of a player. As was Tony. I guess I gained a crush on both of them for the same stupid reason. They were, I guess, bad boys. They didn't care about what was right or wrong in the eyes of the public. They only cared about how much fun they had. They were invited to all the parties. I envied them in a way. How they were so careless. I spend almost every second of my life trying to decide. Decide how to answer a question, or how to talk to certain people. Even stupid things like if I should blink right now or hold my eyes open a bit longer. I do everything I can to impress people. It's because I'm scared of being alone. That's why Amber is my best friend. She's the one person that I don't have to try and impress. She actually likes me for who I am. I still remember the day we first met...

*Flashback to freshmen year*

I was sitting alone at a table in the corner of the lunch room. I was pretty shy at the time being. I was at a new school. The school was for the performing arts. I had been excepted into the vocal magnet. That was really the only good thing about life. Out of nowhere a bright blue eyed, hyper girl sat next to me. She had blond hair that was more curly then I've ever see on anybody. She looked about my age. 14 at the time. She was wearing a Panic! At The Disco shirt, my favorite band at the time. She sat down extremely confident but I could see the bit of shyness.
"Hello, my name is Amber. I'm a theater major. What's your name?" Theater major. That's wear all the confidence comes from.
"My na..."
I started to talk but my voice cracked because I had been quiet all day. I started again.
"My name is Ireanna. I'm a choir major."
She smiled, she had a pretty smile. I liked her eyes.
"Ireanna."
She recited back to herself.
"I like it, but I think I'm gonna call you Rena. Is that ok?".
I was really happy. I had never been given a nickname before.
"Yes, I love it."

*End of flashback*