Ambiguous Love

I sat on the steps of my house, wondering about my past. The rain seemed the enhance the mood of sadness. I didn't quite understand why of all these years would I be thinking about this. I watched as a drop of rain slithered down my forehead to my the bottom of my chin. Then that drop fell into the ground, it was difficult to understand that the drop was really me.

I felt like if it was me, falling and trying to grip on something to help me up. But eventually that grip would loosen and I would fall. I wouldn't know where I would fall but as long as I am free of this sadness, I'm done.

But, as If I would ever be free of this sadness. I don't even think I would ever be free of any of this. I looked at the sky, contemplating for a minute or so. Maybe longer, I couldn't keep track of my thoughts or time.

“Rosalia,” called Mother, “The grocery!”

“Yeah,” I shouted, “I’m going.”

I put my hood on, and walked casually to my bicycle.

I went on, and rode it to the supermarket.

My mood dropped further when my mom’s ex-boyfriend was waving at me.

“Hi Rosalia!” He greeted, as I got out of my bicycle.

I dropped my bicycle on the ground, and power walked inside. I managed to ignore him, and was glad I did. One annoying man he is. She had to date the owner of the only supermarket in this town.

“Eggs, Milk, Cereal, Butter, and Salt.” I reminded myself.

I looked through every aisle for the damn Salt. Every second I groaned to myself or reminded myself of how my life sucks.

You know what? I’ll look for the Milk.

I walked to the dairy products. I grabbed the eggs, milk, and the butter. I was relieved I found it, I get easily frustrated for anything.

Now, I tried to look for the cereal.

Bingo!

I found the cereal. I slightly jumped because the honey bunches of oats were at the top.

Why did that have to be her favorite cereal?

I tried to jump once again, and when I jumped I let everything fall out of my hands. There goes the eggs. There goes the milk, and there goes the butter.

The milk spurted out of the carton, and all the eggs broke. And the worst part was it fell all over my only sneakers. Just amazing.

“My life is great,” I sarcastically said.

“I’m sure your life isn’t that bad,” A voice said, startling me.

I was so frightened I slightly jumped, letting some of the cereal drop.

I managed to put my head down, and blush with embarrassment.

I looked up to see the person slightly smiling.

“As you can see,” I began, “My life is just amazing!”

Great. This man is handsome too. What a life I have?

He grabbed the cereal I wanted. I eyed him suspiciously. Why’d he known what cereal I wanted?

It sucks being this short. I’m not short, I have a decent height. But, it’s just he is so tall. Tall enough to grab the cereal that’s so high. I estimate that he is approximately six foot one or two. While I’m five foot six.

He handed me his cart which had Milk, Eggs, Salt, Butter, and the cereal I wanted.

Before I opened my mouth to speak he said: “I guess everyone needs that huh?”

“Uh, Thanks.” I finally said.

He winked at me, “No problem.”

Did he wink at me? I think I'm going crazy.

A worker walked to the mess, and looked at me in disgust. I manage to chuckle at her expression.  I looked at her with a big smile on my face.

“Did you do this?” She asked.

“No. She didn’t, I did,” He said before I did.

I looked at him slightly surprised. I couldn’t let him say he did it. He’ll have to pay for the things I destroy.

“He did-”

“Yeah, Sorry about that,” He told her, cutting me off. He motioned me to be quiet.

She took a good look at him, and nodded.

“That’s fine, just be careful,” She said.

We both walked away, and I looked at him in awe.

“Yeah, there’s an advantage with these good looks,” He cockily said.

I scoffed, letting out a small laugh.

“You’re new in town, Right?” I asked.

He smirked, “How’d you know?”

We started our way walking to the register.

“I don’t know. I guess they way you present yourself. You look more like from the city.”

He chuckled.

“Just because I’m wearing a shirt with a tie, I’m from the city.”

“No. Also I’ve been living here all my life, never seen you. I’m sure with that beautiful face of yours I would’ve remember you.” I sarcastically said.

“Nice one.”

“So what brings you here? Not much to see out here.” I asked quite curious.

“I guess the history.”

“Oh that’s nice.” I said.
When we got on the line, he forgot his purpose for the supermarket.

I laughed at his expression.

“Hold me a spot?”

I nodded, and he ran to get everything he needed.

Crazy man he is. I couldn’t believe I went from being pissed to amused. Crazy.

After four minutes, he got everything he needed. And was back on the line.

“So what are you interests besides being clumsy?” He asked, smirking.

“Yeah, and that’s definitely an interest. I’m a painter.” I answered his question.

“Oh a painter. What do you paint?” He asked.

“Quite everything. I try to expand my knowledge on different types of painting. My favorite is cubism.”

He nodded in amazement. I guess he thinks people from here are stupid or something.

“In the library, I took out a book on artistry. If you want we could go so I could show you where put it.”

I nodded, “That’ll be great.”

So he was the one who took it. I waited months for that lady to order it, and she gave it to him. She couldn’t say she has it on hold.

After we paid, we walked across the street to the library.

“Hello,” He greeted the librarian.

“Hi,” She said flirtatiously.

I rolled my eyes. They act like if they’ve never seen a handsome man.

She loked at him in a daydreaming matter.

We walked towards the back of the library, and stopped when he remembered.

“There it is,” He said, bending down.

He bent down to get it and as he was about to hand it to me, I tripped over a stack of books.

He managed to catch me before I fully fell. Luckily the groceries weren’t hurt by my clumsiness. I put them down before I do something else stupid.

We both chuckled, I couldn’t believe this.

He handed it to me, and I couldn’t help myself from smiling.

A complete stranger is making me smile, while my own mother can’t make me smile.

We looked into each other’s eyes, and we got closer and closer. Then our lips met. I couldn’t believe it, my heartbeat was racing. It was like fireworks. The kiss turned into an intense kiss, and we lead each other into the storage room.

His hands were on my waist, while my arms were around his neck. He’s scent was so intoxicating, I just melted by his lips. His touch so soothing. His lips so soft. I don’t even know this guy, and look he makes my heart skip a beat.

We pulled away to breathe, both of us surprised that this is happening. We both smiled, then our lips met once again. Our lips were slightly open, and I could feel the kiss getting more intense. We went against the wall, and knocked  over anything in our way. One of my legs were wrapped against his leg. My hands roamed throughout his hair. His hair was so soft. Geez. Wow.

I could feel the heart beating fast against mine. I could feel his muscular structure against me.   At least I’m not the only one that’s nervous. He pulled away to kiss my neck. He went back to my lips. Before this went further, I decided to stop it. Even though I didn’t want to stop it, I had too. I didn’t want to regret something, but I’m sure I’ll regret this too. Walking away from this mysteriously gorgeous man.

I pulled away, both of us heavily breathing.

“I’m so-sorry,” I said in a cracked voice, still dazed by the kiss.

When he heard that he let me go.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for this to happen, I-”

“It’s fine,” I said, before leaving. I walked out, and grabbed my groceries. My face still flushed, and my heart beating still fast. I feel like if I just came out of a roller coaster. The librarian eyed me suspiciously as I walked out. I think my voice is still cracked, and I could feel the heat of my skin still rising.

I walked back to the supermarket, and grabbed my bicycle. On the way back home I couldn’t stop thinking about him.

His messy black hair, those mysterious greyish black eyes, his features just flawless. He’s just perfect.