Lie to me, you can feel that this love was never real. Walk away, you can't learn to love again.
-- Lie to Me, Red
Number Eight:
Clear skies before a storm
I was naive. I was a stupid kid who was too optimistic for her own good. I was an idiot.
It's just strange to think that I was that stupid kid just last year.
And it's even stranger to compare the past and present version of me... And to look at how I grew and matured through the whole experience. I can't say that it's something I like doing.
Anyways, stupid little me decided to let her guard down again.
Directly following the wedding, I felt sick about the union. I couldn't sleep at night and I began to feel physically sick and worn down and tired all the time.
But as weeks wore on and the two of them came to visit, and as I saw the smiles they both wore, I let myself think that maybe they could work.
My brother and sister in law came home every weekend, always smiling. They told us funny stories about their life and laughed. Rosalie's eyes sparkled as she laughed. I had never been too keen on her laugh, it was all high pitched and screechy, but still it hinted at happiness, and that was all I wanted for her and Preston.
She would come into my room and talk to me for hours when they came to stay. She talked to me about boys and told me I should be careful around them, (as if any boys were attracted to me... But I accepted the advice and took it as a sign that I wasn't completely hopeless.)
She talked to me about spiritual things, told me I was doing a great job of living out my faith.
That was when I began to really look up to her.
Since I'd now had my driver's license for about a year, I began to make the hour long drive to Rosalie and Preston's and stayed weekends sometimes when they couldn't manage to get home. I was accepted with open arms and began feeling like I was in a mature adult relationship with my sister.
I was so wrong.
Because everything was about to blow up, but there is no way I could ever see it coming.
YOU ARE READING
Heart-Shattered
Non-FictionWhen a heart is broken, there is hope of it being put back together, fixed, cured. But my heart has been shattered, and I am hopeless. This is a collection of true stories, as told through my eyes.
