The Mute & The Model (Nina D. & Stephen J)

1.) Messiah the Mute (rewrite)

A/N

This Chapter is basically a rerun of everything Messiah has been through in his life. So in case you get confused, he is basically explaining what made him go mute.

May Cause Triggers

Messiah

I am a 19-year-old boy with no voice.

Literally.

I haven't spoke a word since I was ten-years-old. I'm what some people like to call a mute. My life is different from everyone else's. My mother committed suicide in front of me when I was nine-years-old and after that, my life was never the same. My father became an alcoholic and I a mute. My father pretends to care for me but in reality, he could care less about me or my health.

He has a girlfriend that he "loves" but I know he doesn't actually know what love is. He didn't even love my mother which only made her worse than she already was. It's clear that his relationship with his girlfriend isn't about love. In fact, I know they both just used each other for sex which sickens me.

Her name is Destiny and she used to sexually abuse me many times before which only added up to my severe depression. My life was so amazing when my mother was alive but her own depression got the best of her.

Sometimes I blame myself for the death of my mother because I was the only one she had left. My parents were still together when she committed suicide. He never showed her love and it pained me to watch my mother's life deteriorate in front of me.

My father is literally the devil's spawn. The day she committed suicide, I was trying to get him to help me save her but he just stood there. He wanted her dead and it was clear. He didn't want me. He even tells me sometimes that I am a disgrace to this world and that I should just kill myself like my mother did.

Sometimes, I wonder what my mother was like when she was a teenager because as soon as I was born she had to become an adult. She was only 16 when she gave birth to me so she never really had a chance to know the teen life. My father was the main cause of her severe depression because when I turned three years old she found out that he had an affair with her older sister.

Do you want to know how my mother found out? She found out because I used to call her sister Mommy. As a child, all I saw was my father kissing my aunt while my mother was away so I thought she was my mother.

The mind of the innocent right.

When my mother found out she was beyond heartbroken.

They used to argue every day and do you want to know why my mother never left?

Because of me.

She was too worried to leave me with my father so she would sleep with me in my room. They thought I was blinded by my innocence to see what actually was going on between them but they were wrong, so wrong.

I noticed everything. Every argument, every curse word, every bad thing my mother had to say about me. I pretended to not notice just for my mother's sake of life.

My voice started getting softer and softer instead of louder. I rarely had friends but the friends I had were the only normal people I had in my life. They were the reason I remembered I was a child because I had the mind of an adult at the age of 9.