Crimson Pines

Memories

It was safe to say that life, sucked.  Halloween was approaching and the town clearly loved their decorations.  The town turned from an already kind of creepy place,  into a downright hell hole, complete with zombies, faux spider webs and pumpkins.  I couldn't even order a regular coffee anymore, the left over cinnamon managed to work its way into my cardboard cup.

I don't actually mind holidays.  Halloween had just always seemed like a strange celebration to me, people dressing up and eating candy?  I suppose that excuse was as good as any.  The weekend couldn't have come sooner, school was fine, it just bored me.  Nothing interesting ever happened there.  Small lanterns hung from the awnings as I walked down the main road, lined with stores.  I'd been told to come and purchase some dinner supplies, and large bags of candy on special.  Clouds hung low in the air, the feeling of the small town closing in around me all too much as I ducked into a shop, lights beaming and noise filling the small space that seemed bigger than the street outside.  

The store wasn't huge, but it had microwavable TV dinners and cheap candy so it was probably a safe bet.  The man running the store was mildly overweight, a beard untrimmed hanging from his chin that sagged a little too low for my liking.

The feeling of unease washed over me.  I remembered the feeling from the night before, when I was on the bridge.  It felt as though I was being watched, goosebumps breaking out along the back of my neck, my hair standing on end as my hands got clammy and I pretended to seem interested in the halloween themed candles in front of me.

Suddenly a smell came over me and I gagged, a woman shopping giving me a disgusted look as she continued to the next aisle.  Trying to control my gag reflex I dropped the things I was intending to buy and exited the shop quickly.  I continued down the main road until I hit the corner and inhaled deeply, intaking a breath of the pumpkin spice air around me.

Suddenly the feeling of unease came back in full force, the smell though, did not.  A man, maybe twenty years old, rounded the corner.  His faced seemed almost perfect, rounded and curved in all the right places.  His lips called to me but my attention flicked back to his eyes as he paused near me, but never came within arms reach.  He ignored my heavy breathing and lit a cigarette.  "You don't have asthma, do you?"  he asked, giving me a brief glance before retraining his eyes on the road ahead.

Before I could answer he turned back around and flicked the ash onto the ground and smiled.  "I hope I'll see you around?" He said, dropping the half smoked cigarette and crushing it underneath his pristinely polished dress shoe.  He looked at me, as though he was expecting an answer, he took a step towards me but as though I'd told him to stop he suddenly turned and walked into the darkness.  As his body moved away my sense of unease faded, leaving me with a hole in my chest.  Although smoking usually grossed me out, the smell of his cologne wafted under my nose and his scent mixed with the smell of burning tobacco calmed me.  I wasn't afraid of him.  I thought.

The walk home was tranquil.  Occasional laughs filled the air around me, making the dark streets seem less eerie.  The slight uphill of the road caused my shoes to keep scuffing since I never lifted my foot quite high enough. This of course caused me to trip multiple times.  Something my mother wouldn't have liked.

I approached my Aunt's house and turned my head upwards, looking at the overflowing gutter and the scratched, peeling paint on the exterior walls. 

It was nothing like my home.  Even though we didn't tend to it often it still glowed with pride, shining, calling to me.  Every time I was there I felt calm.  My heart slowed, my shoulders relaxed and my head released the built up tension from overdoing my extensive hours at school and work.  It was like my own personal masseuse. 

Staring at the shell of my new house, my heart tightened as I thought of where I really belonged.  Trying to push my feelings aside I entered the house, not needing a key since my Aunt didn't believe that anyone would try and break in so she always left the door unlocked.  I believed we were going to either be robbed or kidnapped and murdered.  I guess we didn't really see eye to eye on anything.  I felt bad that I was constantly fighting with her.  I just had no intention of staying here.  

The rest of the evening went by quietly as we ate in front of the TV watching new episodes of Cheers.  At least that was one thing we didn't fight about.  We  shared the same humour so finding a show we agreed on watching was easy.  We laughed and shared fond glances.  It felt almost normal.  Although school was boring and nothing interesting ever happened, I had Andy and co. and they were nice enough.  We usually talked about class work and who liked who.  It was almost like I had real friends.

The fact that I thought they weren't real friends clearly meant that we hadn't clicked yet.  I excused myself and went to my room to study.  We had a maths test coming up and I wanted to at least try and be prepared.  I never really cared about school and studying back home but it just felt like a habit I should try and pursue while I was here.

I had a pink landline on my bedside table that my Aunt had set up.  I'd spoken to Andy a couple of times but other than that it never got used.  My mind slowly wandered back to the gorgeous man I'd seen earlier.  As much as I tried to tell myself he was strange and creepy, I couldn't help but want to trace my hand over his cheekbones and jaw, my thumb brushing his lower lip.

Oh god he's like at least four years older than me.  I grabbed my maths book and tried to read but I couldn't help but wonder who he was.  I mean, it's a small town, I'll run into him again.  I wanted to tell Andy, she'd probably know who he was.  Then again, did I want her to know that I was crushing on some random guy I'd just met who was plenty older than me?  I already knew the answer as I threw my self onto my bed, sliding off my jeans but not having the effort to get fully changed.  I slipped under my blankets and drifted off into a deep sleep filled with darkness and one single flickering street light with a woman, with a deformed face, standing waving under it.