The Exalted Guard

Little Talk

Mike raised his eyebrow, "My everything?"

"Your everything?!" Jeremy sounded surprised, what for Mike didn't know, "You look like you're....glowing." It was true, there seemed to be some kind of 'aura' around Mike that lit up the rather dark office.

"Thanks Jere, I should get you a soda for that," Mike sat down in the chair next to Jeremy, putting his feet up on the table. Surprisingly, his boss didn't seem to mind. "However, right now you need to clear up what happened last night for the boss and me."

"That's exactly what I was doing until you- wait! What do you mean for the boss and you?!" Jeremy looked at Mike like he had grown a third head. "You mean you don't remember anything that happened last night?!'

Mike shook his head, "Nope. Last thing I remember is three of the fuckers surrounding me, then I blacked out and had this weird dream."

"Dream? What dream?"

Mike took his feet off the desk and leaned forward, "Ok, so there I was, about to meet my Maker at the hands of those furry fags, when BAM I start glowing gold and punch straight through the bear's arm! At first I'm like 'The Fuck was that!?' Then I realized it was a dream, and I started going HAM on those motherfuckers!"

"HAM, Mike?"

"Hard As A Motherfucker. Duh," Mike softly slapped Jeremy on the back of the head, causing him to fall forward a bit. He caught himself and looked at Mike with annoyance. Mike ignored him, "So, anyway, I rushed at the bastards and started ripping into them. I tear the chicken's and the rabbit's heads off, and shove the bear through a wall! At which point, Yiffy the Pirate and his sister, Yifferella, came at me(heh heh) and I shoved my fist through the captain's chest.

I then began to use him as a hammer on the girl fox until they both stopped resembling foxes. Then you came in Jeremy, I passed out again, and I woke up at home. That's my story and I'm sticking to it."

Jeremy was looking at Mike with his mouth wide open, "You've got to be kidding me. Is that what happened last night?! Were you on drugs or something!?"

Mike looked at Jeremy with a blank look, "You know I don't do that kind of stuff, Jere. And besides it was just a dream."

"No it wasn't! You must've did that, because that is exactly what I saw when I walked out of the closet!"

"Eh, probably just a coincidence. More than likely they all tripped or something."

"That sounds completely-"

"Reasonable, Mr. Schmidt," Jeremy stared at his boss in disbelief. His boss, had just said that what Mike said was completely reasonable, "It is obvious that Mr. Fitzgerald has been exaggerating the events that transpired last night."

"No I'm not! Why are you taking his side on this!"

"Because, Jere, it's the only feasible answer. I mean, do you seriously think that I could punch a robot's arm off of it's body?" both Mike and Mr. Fazbear had a massive laugh at Jeremy's expense. Jeremy looked between the two men.

'What is going on here?!' He thought as they laughed. 'A minute ago, he was busting my balls. Now Mike comes in and he completely switches gears? The Hell?'

Mr. Fazbear finished laughing as he wiped a tear from his eye, "Oh yes, quite hilarious. Well, it is obvious that neither of you are at fault, so both of you just return to your post. We'll pay for any damages caused, and make sure the customers are pacified."

Mike stood up, and offered his hand, which the manager shook enthusiastically, "Thanks man. Me and Jere'll get back to it." Mike let go of his boss' hand and nodded towards the door. Jeremy, still distraught at the turn of events, walked through it in a trance.