Afraid and desperate

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I'm afraid.
Afraid that I won't make it.
Afraid that I will dissapoint everyone.
Afraid that people will be angry.
Afraid that everything will get wrong again.
Everything went so well. I was in love again and so where you but it all changed.
I didn't want it to change. I'm so stuck in love that you probably can do anything and I will forgive you just because I love you.
Don't take this wrong but I dont want to lose you but I'm not myself anymore and I'm changing. But I don't want to change I want to be me.

But who am I?
Who is the person I so desperate want to be?

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