1 | Star Wars Rebels: Beginning Of The End (completed)

Part 34

Rebel base, Atollon, 1238, 3279 LY

     Later that day, Ezra and Kanan woke up. Kanan once again disappeared and Ezra walked around, bored. Hera sent him on a mission to get him busy, and he took it with glee. Now Zeb was walking into the cabin he shared with Ezra, ready to take a nap. He didn't realize that Chopper had gotten in until the droid shocked him, and he bumped into Ezra's bunk, opening a bottom compartment.

     The Lasat picked up a datapad in the compartment, examining it. Chopper beeped, and Zeb nodded once. It was Ezra's 'pad, and it said ''Journal'' on the front. 

     The two walked out of the room and to the kitchen where Sabine and Hera were. ''Guys,'' Zeb called, ''look what I found!'' 

     Hera and Sabine looked up, seen the datapad, and wanted it. Zeb gave it them, watching their expressions. Finally, Hera growled, ''Put this back, Zeb.''

     Sabine held up a hand. ''Wait,'' she pleaded. ''If we looked, we would be invading his privacy. But remember when he tried to kill himself? We could stop that from happening again.''

     After a long moment, Hera nodded in agreement. She took the 'pad, looking at it. ''The first one is a video,'' she remarked. Putting it on a holoprojector, she then hit Play.

A blue-haired boy sat smiling at the screen, eyes twinkling with energy. ''This is my first entry,'' he began, ''so bear with me. I don't know who will see this or when, but here it is for your eyes. It might be crappy, but oh well.'' He shrugged, then continued. ''My parents got me this for my sixth birthday. They told me: 'Put whatever you want in this. Our gift to you.' Well, that's what I'm doing. 

''Besides the history, I can't tell you much more.'' Ezra then looked away from the screen, smiling. Then he turned back, frowning a little. ''Well, I'm off to Malachor with Kanan and Hera. Wish me luck!'' Then the video entry stopped.

     Zeb rubbed his neck, shaking his head. ''That's...not going to end well.'' Sabine hit the next button. Journal entry.

Well, I'm back. The mission to Malachor went terribly wrong. The Inquisitors showed up, and Vader showed up, everything just went so WRONG! How, I can explain. Kanan's blind, Ahsoka's dead, and it's ALL MY FAULT! I trusted Maul. It's just as bad as killing Ahsoka and blinding Kanan myself! What was I thinking?

I was foolish, naive. I wanted to see the best in people. Now all this happened, and I feel one emotion that I've never felt before. I've had some bad things done to me, and I have the scars to prove it. But I've only felt this emotion once before. Grief.

Yes, grief. Of all the emotions. It makes me wish there was no tomorrow for me, makes me want to stop breathing just to see them again. I had to be strong on the streets. Now I'm just falling apart. How does the crew not see it? Isn't it obvious, the pain? The guilt, the remorse? The hopelessness? Wanting to be dead just to change things back to the way they were?

I could've saved Ahsoka. When she pushed me back, I could've just slid into the Sith temple at the last moment and saved her from Vader. But what did I do? I left. I probably could've saved Kanan as well. But what did I do? I left because I listened to Maul. How stupid am I? Why?

     Everyone in the room sat speechless, jaws agape. They didn't see it.