Isang linggo na ang nakalipas mula noong tulungan ko si nerd sa mga bully. It also means na one week na rin akong ginugulo ng nerd na 'to na gusto raw makipagkaibigan.
"Sige na. Friends na tayo, please!", si Rivera na halos pagtinginan na ng mga nakakasalubong namin sa pathway. Tss. Ang kulit niya! Tiningnan ko lang siya ng masama. Hoping na titigilan na niya ako, pero...
"Waaahhh! Ang ganda mo pa rin kahit naka-poker face ka!", tili niya. Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay habang patuloy na naglalakad papuntang cafeteria. I really thought she's gonna stop following me, but I still feel her presence after me.
"Friends na kasi tayo para tumigil na ako sa pangungulit. Please. Please. Pleaseeeee!"
Damn! I hate how she acts! She's so childish! Tumigil ako sa paglalakad at lumingon sa kanya.
"No." sabi ko at naglakad na ulit. Ramdam ko pa rin ang presensya niya na nakasunod kaya hindi ko na napigilan ang sigawan siya.
"Will you stop following me and get out of my sight?!" inis kong sigaw. Nagulat siya pero sandali lang at nagsalita.
"Ano bang pwede kong gawin para matanggap mo ako bilang kaibigan?" And she pouted.
Oh god! Can't she get what I mean? I don't like her. I don't want to be friends with her! Not with anyone!"Nothing! Just leave! You are too annoying! I helped you to get away with those bitches but that doesn't mean that you are allowed to disturb me" sa puntong ito, hindi ko na napigilan ang pagtaasan siya lalo ng boses. I hate annoying people.
I walked towards one of the vacant tables in the cafeteria and put my things there, leaving the nerd at the entrance. Hindi ko na siya pinansin.
But something inside me wants to go and comfort her. What the hell? Since when did I learn to care for someone?
I fished my phone out to divert my attention, but whatever I do, still, I can't get my mind off the nerd. That nerd is giving me headache!
Hindi ko napigilan ang sarili kong tumingin sa entrance ng cafeteria. There, she's standing and her years are freely streaming down to her cheeks. The other students are now looking at her with questioning looks, well others are giving her disgusting looks. And hell, why do I pity her? I am the reason why she's at that state right now. I guess this isn't guilt.
Dala na rin siguro ng inis, dahil sa pinagtitinginan rin ako ng ibang estudyante, naglakad ako papunta sa kanya at tiningnan siya ng masama. I grabbed her wrist and dragged her inside the cafeteria."You are making a scene. Stop crying like a lost kid."
"S-sorry, g-gusto ko lang naman makipagkaibigan eh", she said at tsaka tumungo.Natigilan ako. Bigla akong nakaramdam ng awa para sa kanya. Bakit kasi ang harsh kong magsalita? Bakit ba ang sama ng ugali ko? Bakit ba hindi ko kayang tanggapin ang katotohanan? Hell! Dahil sa nerd na 'to kaya nahihirapan na naman ako ngayon! Naaalala ko na naman siya! Naaalala ko na naman ang sakit! At naaalala ko na naman ang huling hiling niya.. na hindi ko alam kung kaya kong tuparin. Huminga na lang ako ng malalim para kalmahin ang sarili ko. I hate weak people. I hate how they let themselves get hurt by those bitches. I looked at the nerd in front of me. What should I do to her? I sighed.
"Fine. We're friends now", sabi ko sabay iwas ng tingin. Nagiguilty ako sa mga nagawa at nasabi ko. She didn't move so I glanced at her. Mababakas sa mukha nitpya ang pagkagulat at kasiyahan. Tss.
"What?" sabi ko na nagdala sa kanya sa kasalukuyan.
"Waaahhh! Totoo? Really? Kaibigan na kita?!" hindi makapaniwalang sabi niya. Even me, nagulat sa mga salitang lumabas sa bibig ko. I didn't expect myself saying those words to her, nor to anyone. It just came out voluntarily from my mouth and I guess I can't take it back anymore. This nerd in front of me is really happy, and I am not a mood breaker to break it. Para ibalik ang pagkatao ko bilang heartless and cold, na unti-unti na namang bumabalik, tinarayan ko nalang si nerd. I don't want to go back to my old self. Not now, at least.
BINABASA MO ANG
Torn Between Choices
AksiCOLD. FEARLESS. FIERCE. That was what she turned into after that incident happened. Everything about her changed. But the worst change she got is that, she learned to blame people. She learned to hurt them. From caring to destructive, she became.