Mackenzie(ON HOLD)

Chapter 3

"Hold onto me," Callan says, reaching behind him to place his hand on my waist as our horse steps through the small, partially frozen creek. I grab his waist tightly, glad for his first words in three hours.

Inverness is in my past- my future is now. Is here, among the trees and stones and mountains I've never seen before. The time passes slowly, especially due to the closed mouth beauty in front of me. I don't dare say anything, for I have no idea how much he heard.

As the clouds darken into night and the temperature turns from freezing to unliveable, I lift my cheek from MacCallan's back when we stop moving. Opening my eyes, I see fire nearby.

"Where are we?"

"Its taking longer than I anticipated to make it through the terrain in the snow. Also, this poor beast is frozen... there's an inn up the road. I've been there once before. We're still about ten miles from Leod."

Castle Leod. I nod, clearing my throat. "I wouldn't mind a fire," I whisper, chuckling. I haven't felt my body the past four hours. "You may have to help me though. I don't think I could get off this horse myself even if-"

"What did Greer see regarding ye and Lachlan?" he blurts out over me. My words cease as I stare at the plaid shielding his large back.

"Callan-"

"Oblige me, Gillian. I've heard that ye feel empty without the man and that something happened between ye. I believe I deserve to know what."

"He kissed me," I breathe, quickly, realizing only now how desperate I was to get that out. "He kissed me and I let him... I kissed him back."

He remains quiet for a long time, still too. I close my eyes when he flickers the reins, forcing the horse forward without words.

"MacCallan, it was merely a goodbye. A goodbye to what we had."

"What ye had...You'd think you'd want to rid of him immediately after what he's done to ye," he says, low.

"Not every day I've spent with him was unbearable, I told you this! He tried to make me happy for a very long time. He could be a very bad man and a very good one, but he loved me and he tried really hard to change my mind. I've gone through a lot with him and that-that plays with someone's mind when you know you'll never see them again."

He moves, swiftly and drops his legs onto the ground. The emptiness startles me. He keeps a hand on the reins but walks from the ground. I stare at him warily before speaking.

"Callan."

He stares ahead.

"MacCallan." His back stiffens but he still doesn't turn. I throw my leg over the horse with difficulty and he looks back, stopping as I dismount the horse, stepping into the snow. "Don't block me out."

He stares down at me, his mouth set into a firm line. "How am I supposed to react to this?"

"You could talk to me!"

"You'll not want to hear what I have to say," he answers stubbornly, turning. I grab his arm, angry.

"Now, you need to tell me!" I shout.

"I dinnae need to do anything!" he shouts back, louder.

"Yes!"

"No!"

"MacCallan, I swear-"

He shakes his head, red now. "I feel like a damned fool! I gave ye everything, my damned heart. Ye own me completely and what do I own of ye? Half? A quarter?"