Behind The Bright Lights

Chapter 12

Kimmy was in a state of profound confusion when she reached home, she almost forgot to pay the cabbie. What had just happened? She dropped her bag and wet clothes as she ran a warm bath. She was shaking violently as she quickly peeled off all her clothes not entirely sure she was shaking because of the cold or the kiss; it was probably both.

Finally settling into the bath, she sighed, leaned back and closed her eyes allowing warmth into her cold body. Whiskey would have been good idea but she hated the idea of keeping alcohol in the house, it encouraged drinking when one was depressed in a situation like the one she had put herself in. Oh, what had gotten into her? Granted she was upset about Chase but to have her boss kiss her like that? So she was attracted to him but if everyone went kissing all the people they were attracted to then what sort of a world would it be? But it was as if another power had taken control of her and she didn't know herself for a while. Her body was still tingling all over from the effect of Nate's lips on hers. The way she had clung to him so desperately was embarrassing and she was sure she'd never be able to face him again yet at the same time something had been woken in her and she couldn't help wanting another kiss from her boss. She'd read the work code of conduct and this fell perfectly under inappropriate behavior; maybe he'd fire her make it easy for her. And even this thought couldn't make her stop wanting Nate. She cried a little more then finally got out of the bath when the water started to get cold. Exhausted by the day's events, Kimmy fell asleep almost immediately to her own surprise and all she saw in her dreams was Nate. Right now it seemed as though the problem with Chase was just a milestone compared to all the confused feelings she was having about Nate.

For Nate it was a completely different case. It seemed as though sleep was nigh on impossible tonight even though he felt extremely crappy. He was probably gonna wake up tomorrow with a headache. Disgust was not even word enough to describe what he felt for himself at that moment. He relived the scene that had played out in the rain earlier that night several times trying to find justification for what he had done and he came to the same conclusion each time; there was no justification. Never in his life had he taken advantage of a vulnerable woman as he had today and of all the women he knew it just had to be Kimmy, right? Not Rocki or even Sharon.

'Dammit!' he slammed his hand on the bedside table for the fifth time that night. It took all his might and will power to stop himself from drowning several bottles of vodka. If Rocki ever found out about this, she'd kill him especially after what she asked him to do yesterday. He'd gone and done the exact opposite at the time that she really could use a friend. He stared up at the ceiling in his darkened room. Not to mention how Sharon would have his head on a platter if she ever found out - which he'd make sure she would never ever find out about this. As long as he could keep his hands off Kimmy for the next weeks, it would be fine. Taking a deep breath, Nate decided he'd make it up to her by helping her as much as he could just as Rocki had asked.

Making that resolve did not make him feel better about himself or from reliving the kiss but it did make him think he might be able to sleep after all tonight.

* * *

Kimmy could not believe it was Monday and for the first time since she started her job, she really had not felt like going to work. But sadly, she was already in the dressing room at the studio and thankfully, she'd done most of her work on Friday so she felt pretty good about that. But that was the only thing she felt good about; Nate was right that day and she had caught a cold all right. Thinking about Nate gave her a jolt in the stomach. She had never wanted to see someone she shouldn't want to see as much as she did Nate.
Maybe, he'd tell her it hadn't been a mistake and that he'd kissed her because he really wanted to and not because he felt sorry for her. That's wishful thinking, girl, she said to herself and snorted which only reminded her that it wasn't a good idea to snort when she was having a cold.