Lionel,
even if I still hate you for what you did to me, I can't go without saying goodbye. You are still the one I love even of you broke my heart into pieces. I'm sorry, Leo. I'm sorry I'm so weak. I'm sorry that I left you, but I couldn't stand the pain anymore.
It hurts. It hurts even more that you are not here with me, holding me in your arms. But I can't go back to you. I can't forgive you, not now. Maybe one day I could but then I won't be here anymore.
Did you think about me as you did it with her? Or did you forget me as soon as you saw her? Did you feel guilt, was I a thought in your head?
I know things like this happen to many people every day and they fight and move on. But I can't, I'm too weak and too tired, even therapy isn't helping anymore. You know I'm a very insecure person, I had always fears of not beeing good enougha. I loved you so much for loving me and giving me self-confidence. But now I hate you for that, because I lost it. Because I gave you everything and you crashed my heart and my soul.
I can't get that image of you and her out of my head. I hate you for causing me so much agony. I just can't take it anymore and I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for not being good enough for you, Leo. And I'm sorry that I didn't made you feel like you made me feel. Because if I did you wouldnt have gone to her. I failed you and this is all my fault. Do you hate me now? I bet you hate me for giving up. I hate me too for being so weak, so it's okay. Whatever you feel or not feel for me, love, hate or pity, it's all okay.
Thank you that you made me feel so alive, so save, so special. I never felt so good before. Thank you for everything, Leo. I just love you so much and I hope you will be very happy.
This is my goodbye to you. Please don't forget me.
I love you.
Neymar
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I want to dedicate this story to JaneBoueri. Because of her I started shipping Neymessi.
