If a tree falls in a forest with no one to hear, does it make a sound? Just like if a person dies in the woods and is never found, are they dead? I stared into Carries dead empty eyes her mangled body was cut almost in half, and blood soaked the dry soil below. She didn't even the chance, as I took the knife out of the sheath my hands shook with the inevitability of my future actions; of what I would need to do to survive. It all started with taking that grass road. We went on a hiking trip for two in the woods behind my families cabin in the woods. It wasn't like there was no trail. We followed it like a god until we couldn't carry on because a tree fell in the woods blocking the path, while I wanted to turn back; Carrie turned to the right and headed deep into the forest. That night when we set up camp, Carrie ran into the forest.
I chased after her; forgetting all of the supplies at camp, how stupid am I right? For the past three days I hunted for her, ran from animals, to find her here. Dead. I'm so hungry. So thirsty. I would've never had considered this if she never ran from camp, if we never went down that grass road. What would taste the best, arm, leg, or stomach. I took a deep breath tears fell from my face, I will take the leg.
"I'm so sorry" I whisper as I began to cut into the soft skin of her thigh, the skin coming away easily. I closed my eyes the flashes of years gone by flooded into my mind. Of how we planned on going to collage together, to name our babies together, and to get old together. I guess going down the grass road ended all of the good things I've ever had. I gently take the meat and place it on the log beside me, beside the crackling fire. I stuck the meat through with a stick and place it over the fire, the smell of the cooking meat made my stomach growl, and my throat gag.
The meat turned brown, it was hard to resist eating while I let it cooled. I brought it to my mouth, teeth touching the meat. The piece of meat that used to be my best friend. I can't eat her. We still have so much to do in life, this piece of meat used to be part of a being that had dreams, aspirations, and goals. I can't do this. My throat burned and my eyes stung; I don't want to do this, I don't want to eat her, yet--- I don't want to die. I began to sob as I threw the piece of meat away, as I threw a part of my best friend away. I took the bloodied knife beside me and placed it at my wrist.
This is the only way I can ever die without a lot of pain; or in extreme pain for a few minutes. I don't want to live with the pain of eating my friend forever, die slowly from dehydration, or die slowly from starvation. The only way out without a lot of pain is to cut my wrist. I drag the knife across blood beginning to pour out of my wrist, it really hurt, it really hurt bad for a few minutes before my body was dropped into cold water. The trees begin to swirl around me, I was going to die. At least it was in my terms.
I could've lived a good life, a life where I had children, where I grew old, where I lived. I'll never get to live my life all because we went down that grass road.
