Running from Nightmares [Destiel Soulmate AU]

Paranoia

[Small note: Sorry I didn't put this up earlier. School just kind of suddenly slammed me. Chapters will probably be slow for a while, because the semester is ending and I have to do last minute projects and study for exams.]

Standing in my office, I think back on this morning. It has been so long since I felt uneasy like that. The last time was with... But he can't be here. I made sure I hadn't told anyone where I had moved. I haven't even talked with anyone from home except for Gabriel. He shouldn't be able to find me because of that. I've been too careful. I had gotten a new phone, new number, and I had even changed my last name. I shouldn't worry, there is no way he is here. 

But the worry slowly eats away at me as I try to rationalize away my fears. I need to know that the people around me are safe, that I'm safe. I grab my phone and call Gabe. It continuously rings and for a second I think Gabe won't pick up.

"Hello?" Gabe asks groggily. I can tell I woke him up, and I briefly wonder why he's still asleep.

"Hello Gabriel."

"Hey little bro, what's up?"

"Do you think you could do something for me?" I can hear the fear creeping into my voice and I know Gabriel will hear it too. Gabe is only a year older than me, and after I skipped a grade in middle school, we spent a lot of time together.  We are close enough that he can notice any small change in my behavior, and I can do the same with him.

"Of course. What's wrong? Did something happen?" Gabriel asks, his voice growing serious. I know I've worried him, maybe I shouldn't have called.

"No- um nothing... I'm probably just paranoid, but I could have sworn that uh... R..." I struggle to say his name. A lump forms in my throat at even the thought of saying it. I pause to take a breath and calm down.

"Can you check to make sure he's not here?" I ask. Gabriel will know who I mean.

"Sure, but you're right, you're probably just being paranoid. After your classes, you should go home and get some rest. Some sleep will help you feel better," Gabe says. Gabe's words are soothing, but his lack of joking shows his worry.

"I'll call you later, when I find out where he is. And Cas..."

"Yeah?"

"Be careful."

  (ಠ ∩ಠ) 

 I try to focus while teaching my classes, but it's difficult. I jump at every little noise and constantly trail off while speaking. Even my students notice my mood. My last class ends at 5:30 and after a quick call to Dean, I head to our meeting spot.

Fall is bleeding into Winter, and even though it's barely 6, the sun has already lit the sky on fire. I've already missed most of the sunset, so after ten minutes the sky has gone dark. The campus's outdoor lights flicker on, but they are few and far in between. 

I stare at a large tree across the parking lot when the lights turn on. A long dark shadow stretches out from it's base. As I wait for Dean, I watch the tree's shadow. I can see every one of my nightmares swirling within the it's lightless depths. I want to look away, but fascination and fear locks my gaze on the shadow. A new light passes by and strips the shadow away from the tree for a second before a car pulls in front of me.

"Hello Dean," I say as I get into the car. 

"Hey Cas," Dean responds. As Dean pulls away from the curb, he turns up his music and we lapse into a comfortable silence. I listen to the old rock songs as I stare out the window. Sitting there, my thoughts turn paranoid, but I shove those thoughts out of my head. I lean my head against the car door, and I focus my thoughts on bees instead. Whenever I needed to get away, I would lose myself in thoughts of bees and flowers. 

"Cas? Buddy?" I lift my and look at Dean. He's looking at me with concern.

"Sorry, what?" 

"You ok?"

"I'm fine."  I notice the car has stopped and we are at my house. I hesitate, not wanting to leave the car just yet. It feels safe and comfortable here in the car with Dean. I look back at Dean and see the concern in his eyes hasn't faded. 

"Hey Cas? I'm not busy tonight, want to have that beer now? We could make a night of it, get a movie or something."

"Sure," I say smiling.

  ʕ◉ᴥ◉ʔ  

I'm so tired, I can barely keep my eyes open. The Return of the King plays on the small tv. After making dinner, Dean and I had started a The Lord of the Rings marathon. I lean my head on Dean's shoulder. The movie's almost over, I want to see the end of it. 

I am in a long dim corridor. I can see a mirror at the end of it. I slowly walk forward. My footsteps reverberate throughout the corridor, bouncing off it's maroon walls. I cringe at the noise. It will draw him to me. I want to run away, but my legs ignore my wishes. I'm stuck to my path, walking to the mirror.

As I draw closer to the mirror, I can see it better. The mirror is framed with carved ornate gold. It is garish but I'm strangely attracted to it. I stop in front of the mirror and I reach out my hand. I don't know why, but I have to touch the mirror. The minute my finger touches the cold hard glass, the dark walls around me shudder and disappear.

A bright light flashes in front of my eyes and suddenly I'm in a dingy bathroom. The white on the floor and walls show every speck of dirt. The lights constantly flicker, leaving me in moments of complete darkness. The mirror is still in front of me, but it is cracked and covered in a thin layer of grime. As I look into the mirror, I notice my reflection is warped and murky, so I clear a large circle in the mirror's dirt with my sleeve. It doesn't do much good, but I can see myself better.

As I stare into the mirror, a bruise forms around my eye. My eyes widen in horror. I try to move my hand to touch my face, but I can't move my arms, I can't move anything. My lips splits. A cut appears on my cheek. My nose starts to bleed. A bruise rings my neck. I want to scream. I want to run, but all I can do is stand there. I hear a faint ringing. 

I notice something moving over my shoulder. Fear fills me. Its icy hands grip my heart. The ringing grows louder. 

"Cassie," a voice says. I feel his breath on my neck as he wraps his arms around my waist. His ebony face appears in the mirror. His brown eyes twinkle as his mouth widens into a toothy grin. I want to shut my eyes, but I still can't move.

"Raphael," I whimper. 

My eyes are thick with sleep and the memories of my nightmare are receding, leaving only fragments behind. I groan. I want to go back to sleep, but something woke me up, and it wasn't the nightmare. 

As the sleepy fuzz clears from my head, I notice I'm lying on top of Dean. I blush as I listen to Dean's heart beating. I'm aware of every place our bodies are touching. One of Dean's arms is resting on my back. His legs are intertwined with mine and my head is on his chest. It is a comfortable but embarrassing position, and I'm glad Dean isn't awake.  A faint ringing fills the air. 

Gabe.

 A knot forms in my stomach as I carefully climb off of Dean and head into my room where my phone is charging. As I answer my cell I notice six missed calls, and they all seem to be from Gabe. 

"Castiel!"

"Hey Gabe."

"Where the hell have you been?"

"My phone was in a different room. I didn't mean to worry you."

"Yeah, well great Cas. Look, I checked up on Raphael." I flinch when he says the name. "It took a while but I finally got one of his maids to tell me where he is. Cas, he knows where you are. If he is not there now, he is going to be soon. You need to leave."

I can't breathe. I look down at my hand where my mark has grown once more. The thought of leaving Dean hurts, but I don't want to entangle him in my mess with Raphael. But... Dean will be safer without me here.

"Alright. I'll call you when I get a new number," I say, my voice cold and detached.