Heliotrope

Chapter 7: Autumn Crocus

"Did you call the school?" I found Clemont, alone and worried sick. I sat beside him on the sofa. I took in his scent. He's eighteen, now. He had uncombed hair tucked into his glasses. Damn.

He sighed, the only light in the room was the light of his computer screen. What an awful way to spend your first few days of real adulthood - feeling responsible for the possible downfall of a seemingly perfect marriage and holding back to tears, praying to very god of every religion that your little sister was safe, wherever she was.  "Yeah, I did."

I wasn't going to follow Ash, no matter how much my heart was begging me to. My mind knew how fragile Clemont was. He needed me more than Ash did, at the time being, anyway. I wanted to ask him, "What did they say?" but I didn't. I knew I didn't need to.

With his face in his hands, he said, "She was at the airport with her friends. They said they didn't know how this could of happened." He looked at up at the sky, wondering if he would ever see Bonnie, again. I wanted to tell him that it would all be fine, to not worry, but how could she? My perfect world was falling apart, and so was his much more lonely one.

I searched frantically for words that I could throw up into the desperate air. "Maybe..." I swallowed. "Maybe she's with her friends? Or she's just gotten lost?"

"What if she's dead?" His voice got louder, full of emotion, not holding back what he was truly thinking, anymore.

"She isn't." No. Bonnie wouldn't go like this. Bonnie would go out with a bang. She would go demanding pop music at her funeral and to be buried in pink lipgloss. I knew this. I didn't know how. But I did. I could feel her heart still beating, somewhere. Just don't do anything crazy, Bon. "She's never going to just disappear. She's going to leave a mark on this world."

"Serena." His broken eyes tore me down to my bones, "She already has." He started shaking, crying. It was like he had just lost all control of his body, water pouring out of his eyes so much that his vision blurred. "Her phone isn't working. I don't know where she is, she isn't even in Kalos. My fourteen year old sister could be all the way in Alola and I wouldn't know it." He screamed, letting everything pour out if him. It wasn't like when Ash did it. I wasn't to scare, it was to release hurt. "It's all my fucking fault! I was the one who let her go to that school. It's all fucking me! It's all fucking on me!" He couldn't control himself. "I can't live like this. I can't do it! I can't take it! Not Bonnie, not her! Why her?" He was out of breath. He just slumped back, facing defeat.

I came to grips with what was really happening. It had been far too long. Nobody had seen Bonnie, she was last seen at the airport with her 'friends' and she hadn't returned a single message. The police weren't taking Clemont seriously. I started to cry, too.

I shared my first kiss with Ash Ketchum. I gave him the gift I'll never get back. I married him. I spent what seemed like a lifetime by his side, kissing him. I thought I had everything I wanted. I thought I was where I was supposed to be.

But we came to Lumiose City, and Bonnie wasn't there. Me and Ash fought. He told me he didn't love me anymore. He went back to Kanto, and for the first time in my life, I didn't follow him. I often pondered my future with my husband. I still loved him, but I had been shattered like a mirror. And the bad that ensued was what was keeping Bonnie away from her brother.

I ran a hand through his soft hair, his breath was heavy. "All we can do is pray. All we can do is make a wish. But Clemont," My hand made its way to his tear-soaked chin. "Bonnie won't go like this. Never."

He opened his eyes. They were so strikingly blue. Like oceans, like skies. His skin was pale and delicate. He was skinny but had his thicker points, like his oddly round hips and chubby thighs. He was somebody who cared about his sister more than anything else. He would have given anything and everything up, he would have given up his own life, it would mean Bonnie's safe return was guaranteed.

He put himself above others. He was the perfect blend of beautiful, intellectual and charismatic. He wasn't athletic but he had a heart made of only the finest gold.

This was the type of man you would want to have children with.

Maybe it was time to stop comparing him to my husband. To just call Ash and tell him that I was sorry and I loved him. But I wasn't sorry. I could cut my hair if I wanted to. I could have make friends. I didn't want to be a rag-doll.

I looked at Clemont and I told him, "Bonnie is fast asleep, I can hear her snoring." He smiled the best he could at that. I placed a supportive hand on his forehead. "She's coming back for you." I kissed him. "For us."