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Jihoon never fell in love before. Nakakain ba 'yun? May mapapala ba tayo du'n? He's not familiar of how it feels. From how his heart raced to how his words falter, Jihoon never knew it was love that he felt.
Until he realized he felt like running out of breath every time Choi Seungcheol touches him. Ah, ito pala 'yun.
Dati okay lang na bigla siyang yayakapin ng Hyung niya mula sa likod niya. Dati okay lang sa kanya ang pagiging clingy nito na kung minsan ay siya pa ang clingy. Dati okay lang yung fake weddings, sudden kisses. Dati wala siyang pakielam kung shiniship ni Mingyu si Seungcheol sa kanya. Okay lang talaga ang mga yun, dati. It was just affection and Jihoon looked at it as a symbol of how close they are.
Everything's different now. Jihoon fell in love. He couldn't touch the elder without hesitating, he can't even stop himself from stuttering when he talks to him while looking at him in the eye. Jihoon fell in love and he didn't know it was like this: so weird, so strange. Ngayon naiinis na siya sa tuwing sobrang lapit ni Seungcheol kay Jeonghan. Naiinis siya kapag hindi siya pinapansin ng Hyung niya. Napapangiti siya sa tuwing ipinaglalapit sila ni Mingyu.
So, this is the thing about love, huh? You want the attention, you want to be loved back, but still would hesitate on making the move. Paano 'pag ayaw pala ni Seungcheol na malapit siya sa kanya? Baka mainis siya kung nagpaka-clingy ito. Ang sakit lang para kay Jihoon. Kasi alam niya, feeling niya hinding-hindi magkakagusto sa kanya ang Hyung niya.
Pfft. Hyung niya? Sa kanya?
Jihoon wants to punch himself. No, he can't blame his self esteem nor his negative thoughts. He should blame himself for falling in love with someone so close yet impossible to reach.
"Ji, kanina ka pa tulala diyan." Seungcheol said before taking a bite of his favorite chocolate bar.
Jihoon shook his head. "Sorry, Hyung. Nag-iisip lang ako ng lyrics."
He turned to the screen where he started to arrange the beats, things Seungcheol will never understand. The eldest sat back, fidgeting. Bakit ba siya nandito, Jihoon wondered. Seungcheol barely visits Jihoon's studio these days. He's always busy talking to Jeonghan and Jisoo, his now best friends.
Nakakatampo, oo. Kasi nung una naman ay siya talaga yung best friend ni Seungcheol. Nung una, siya ang lalapitan nito sa tuwing may problema siya o sa tuwing kailangan niya ng kausap. Best friend na nga lang ang pwesto niya sa buhay ni Seungcheol, nakuha pa ng iba.
Seungcheol sighed as he watch his co-member work hard. "May schedule tayo bukas, matulog ka na nga." he said, removing the earphones Jihoon's wearing. Jihoon felt the latter's fingers brush to his skin, and from that simple touch, he shivered. Nababaliw na ata ako. Kailangan ko na nga siguro tulog.
"Kailangan ko pa tapusin 'to. . . Comeback na natin sa-"
"Sa tingin mo ba maganda kalalabasan niyan kung pinapagod mo sarili mo?"
"Ine-enjoy ko naman." Jihoon turned his swivel chair to face Seungcheol, grabbing the earphones from him.
"Pakinggan mo," he lazily muttered, putting the earphones on the elder but Seungcheol refused by covering his ears. The eldest then grabbed Jihoon's wrist and took him out of the studiom, in which Jihoon flinched on the touch. Yumuko siya, para ba ang interesting ng sahig at ayaw niyang tanggalin yung tingin niya dito. How is he supposed to do that when he's sure that his cheeks are a bright shade of red right now?
"Papakinggan ko yung mga ginawa mo. Nandu'n pa si Jun sa practice room, sabay na kayong umuwi." Seungcheol said with a smile before shutting the door of the studio in front of the younger.
How can Jihoon not fall in love with Choi Seungcheol if he's like this?
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❝he touches you and you light on fire. your wrist blazes where his fingers meet your skin. the burns don't show, but it's hard to breathe with ash in your lungs. it's so hard to breathe. you're suffocating daily.❞
