Cope

November 1st 2016

Tuesday

Remembering Sunday, when him and I intwetwined our soft fingers as he rubbed my hand with his thumb.

"You're enjoying this aren't you?" He smiled looking at me as I shy away viewing the tall trees that stand ouside of the car.

"Ya is that bad?" I bark sarcastically.

"No," He ends the conversation. He then picks me up and places me on his lap.

"Okay Devon don't!" I laugh nervously due to my insecuritys.

"Why?" He questions.

"You know why. I hate being picked up I feel gross and ugly." I worried as I struggled to get back into the passengers seat. He woldn't let go.

"But you're not ugly you're beautiful." He said still looking at me attempt to snake out of the situation. He laughs at my struggle.

I give up. "Okay you win." I laugh arching my back over the center consil landing my head in the passeger seat.

He laughs again still looking at me. "You look worried."

"I'm not but we should go walk somewhere!" I lie and yelp intensily, "see look at the beautiful trees!" I point out the windshield.

"There's nowhere to go," he explains.

"So we can go anywhere!" I struggle more attempting to open the car door, I then realize it is locked. My heart skips a beat. "Please Devon I want to go somehwere." I signal to him I don't want to be in the car anymore.

"Awe, okay." He says opening the door. I then jump out with such freedom and run around near the car.

"Yes! Lets go!" I run ahead to get distance in need of a break of him manhandling me. He catches up nearly 10 seconds later and stops me pulling me in. Fuck.

He starts rubbing his chin on the side of my head while hugging me, as this occurs he pulls up my shirt a little bit feeling my stomach. I happily laugh while trying to playfully run away. He wont let go of my hips as I jog in one place. In frustration I drop my head while he holds me.

"I want to walk." I nicely complain.

He then turns me around so that I'm facing him, he's close and I don't like it. He tilts his head looking at my eyes as I dilly dally trying to get away. He next grabs my chin and makes me face him. I'm scared.

"You're so cute." He fakely says looking at my lips.

I struggle even more turning my head the opposite direction of his everytime he turns. He grabs my chin again, this time I remain calm and see what happens. I see him staring at my lips. I know whats about to happen and it better not happen.

He laughs and next thing I know we're kissing, though I don't even move my lips. He pulls away. "I like you a lot," He says still staring at my lips.

I laugh. Now we're kissing again, still I stand as a statue, scared and confused.

"You're barely kissing me back." He wonders.

"Yeah haha."I shake it off hoping he'll realize I don't want this. I look away again not knowing how to handle the tention. I feel him grasp my chin, pull me over and kiss me harder. I still stand motionless feeling our lips depart one another.

"Why wont you kiss me back?" He worries.

"I just don't know what to do, not sure if I'm ready for this." Excuses. "Can we go back? I got to be at Katie's soon." I pull out my phone checking the time, it reads 2:35, I have to be at her place by 3 and were 20 minutes away.

He shrugs, "I guess." He sappily says as I pull away from his grip making way for his car.

We both get in and he starts the car right away. He wasn't procrastinating for once like he was waiting for me to do something. He was doing what I wanted.

As we took off he lay his hand ontop of mine feeling the grooves of my fingernails. I easily get turned on, it's the little things that get me. With him being an attractive 18 year old senior and me being some dumb 15 year old freshman he easily had me. In the palm of his hand.