Dear Diana

February 10, Wednesday

Dear Diana,

Dylan called me over to sit with him at lunch today. I was scared to. I knew that Georgina would probably throw a fit if she saw me sitting with him and I guess a part of me wanted to see that happen, but I was too much of a coward.

I care too much what people who only pretend to like me think of me. I know that that's messed up and stupid, but can you genuinely say that you don't care what others think of you?
I think everybody does, whether they like it or not. It's human nature.

And so I smiled and shook my head when he asked me. Neither Georgina nor Lex saw any of this and so I was spared their jealous scrutiny. I could see that Dylan was not happy with my answer and for a moment I thought that he was going to come over, but he let it go.

Instead, he mouthed ‘after school’.

At that moment, Georgina cooed my name, ‘‘Ana, I believe you have something to share.”

I was taken off guard. “What?”

She rolled her eyes impatiently, “Dylan. What did he say about me?”

I struggled to come up with something good to say, “he uh, he said that you're very pretty, but he's not looking for a relationship right now.”

“Are you serious?” She asked me, a bit put out, “he said that?”

I was very aware that I was becoming a regular liar. “Yeah, he did.”

Lex laughed at Georgina's expression, “he probably said that because he didn't want to hurt your feelings.”

“Oh, shut up.” Georgina glowered at her, “no offence Lex, but I don't think that diet is working out for you. It's why the new jeans you bought yesterday almost suffocated you. You can come over anytime to use my dad's gym. He does his power workouts there.”

I did my best to keep a straight face. Dylan was right. They were both shallow. I made my best pokerface and sat in silence as they traded insults.

I can't say who won the argument. They were both evenly matched.
Needless to say, they didn't speak to each other for the rest of the day.

After school, Dylan was waiting for me at the bottom of the steps.

“Hey,” he said when I reached him, “I couldn't help noticing a very heated disagreement at your table today. What was that about?”

“It's quite hard to tell. I mean, they kept changing tactics.” I laughed.

“Speaking of tactics,” he said taking me by the arm and leading me away from the throng of people coming down the steps, “I have something to ask you.”

My hand tingled in his. I had no idea what he was planning. We stopped somewhere near some lone benches underneath a shady tree. He turned to me.

“You didn't give me a chance today. I wanted to tell you, to ask you rather...”

He stroked the back of my palm absentmindedly with his thumb.

“Would you like to come over at my place tomorrow evening? There's something I've been working on that I've been meaning to show you. I don't want to spoil the surprise really. So, are you in?”

His eyes didn't give anything away.

“Okay,” I said, a bit distracted by the circle he was tracing on my hand.

“Awesome,” he said, somewhat relieved, “let's get you home then.”

I'm sitting at my desk right now wondering what this surprise is. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous. Would you consider this to be a date?

I'm going to end this entry here. I'll tell you how it all goes tomorrow.