The Dance

Chapter 11

I feel everything falling apart again, I can feel my blood pressure rising and my heart beating at an unbeliviably abnormal paced. I stare at him all the scenes running through my head of the worst night of my life.

"What?"

"The driver, it was Devin"

"Where is he?"

"Probably at his house"

I get up so fast I grab my bag and head to the door. All of this anger pulsing through my body is fueled but a arrogent life ruing baby killing drunk driving murder and I just want to pound his face in. I jump into my car. The other door is open and Xavier gets in.

"Ali what are you doing"

"Something I've been wanting to do since that night" I say pulling out of the parking lot

"Ali you should really think about this"

"Just tell me where to go"

"No think about what you are going to do"

"I know what im going to do now tell me where to go or I'll push you out of this car and find him by myself."

He tells me where he live unwillingly, I was driving fast but then some of my common sense came into play so i slowed to much to Xavier's relief and we get there much later then I would have liked and once we are there I get out and slam the car door go up to the door and pound on it.

A few minutes later a lady opens up it looks like a maid I storm pass her and up some stairs I hear Xavier telling the maid some lame story and I go down a hallway and open every door and by the third one I open it and see Devin and blondy in bed naked she screeching trying to cover herself and he's trying to put on hes boxers. Xavier comes in behind me and blondy pales

"Xavier it's not what it looks like" plastic sex doll says

"Screeching barbie leave" i say "unless you want to watch this"

"What you have no-"she stops when I turn and give her the coolest most deadly glare I could mester up she quickly gathers her stuff and runs out while be naked. I then turn my gaze to Devin.

"You want to know what i am feeling right now?" i ask titling my head to the side while staring at him

"What?" he asks stupidly

I take a step closer and raise my hand telling Xavier to stop cause i was going to hit him... yet when I heard him take a step too.

I said "DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IM FEELING RIGHT NOW? TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING THROUGH MY HEAD!!!" i scream

"Yes" he says shaking a little good i want him to be scared

"YOU KILLED THEM!!"

"What?"

"OH DON'T YOU DARE PLAY DUMB THE PEOPLE YOU HIT TWO YEARS AGO!!! DID YOU KNOW THAT THAT WAS ME!! THAT THAT WAS THE NIGHT THAT MY BOYFRIEND HAD PROPOSED AND I HAD TOLD HIM I WAS PREGNANT!! DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAD KILLED THEM BOTH!!" i screamed

He's face had turn into a arrogant smirk

"Well it was probably for the better a husband and a baby are boring anyways and a baby would just hold you back."

"There's nothing holding me back from doing this". I say I run and literally jump on him throwing punch after punch

I *punch* COULD OF HAD *PUNCH* A FUCKING FAMILY *punch punch* I COULD HAVE A BABY A FUCKING FURTURE!!! i roar and Xavier finally comes to pulls me off I honestly think he just let me I honestly wasn't paying attention to if he was or not. I was breathing hard I stood back to catch my breath and once I did I started yelling again.

"YOU RUIN EVERYTHING FOR ME I LOST EVERYTHING THAT DAY AND WHAT DID YOU LOSE NOTHING. YOU DIDNT EVEN GET JAIL TIME BECAUSE OF YOUR DAD YOU KILLED MULTIPLE PEOPLE!! ONE OF THEM BEING AN UNBORN CHILD." I say with tear running down my face I honestly dont give a fuck. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO SEE THE PERSON YOU LOVE MOST BURN!! TO LITERALLY FEEL YOUR BABY LIFE DRAIN FROM INSIDE YOU TO FEEL IT SLOWLY DYING AND YOU CANT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT!!"

"DO YOU? HUH HUH DO YOU?"

"No" he croaks out

"WELL LET ME TELL YOU ITS LIKE TAKING THE THING YOU LOVE MOST AND HAVING IT DIE RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU. DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO LOSE SOMEONE YOU LOVE!!!"

"DO YOU?"

Nothing

"DO YOU!!"i scream louder

Nothing

"I ASKED YOU A FUCKING QUESTION!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE? YES? OR NO?"

In a very shaky voice he whispers a silent

"Yes"

"WHAT WAS THAT?"

"Yes" he whisper again

"IM SORRY I DIDNT FUCKING HEAR YOU"

"YES". he gets up and starts pacing the floor mumbling incorhearant things pulling at his hair and then he turns to me with tears streaming down his eye and regret and anger pool in his eyes.

"YES YES I DO KNOW I HAD TO LIVE WITH THE FACT THAT I WAS THE REASON BEHIND HIS DEATH THAT I WAS TO DRUNK TO WATCH WHERE I WAS GOING LET ALONE BE ABLE TO DRIVE. SO YES I DO KNOW WHAT IT WAS LIKE AND I WANTED TO GO TO JAIL BUT NO IT WOULD LOOK BAD ON OUR FAMILY AND MY DAD COULDNT HAVE THAT NO HE COULDNT CAUSE IT WOULD RUIN HIS PERFECT REPUTATION!!"

"YET YOU LET YOUR DAD PAY EVERYONE OFF. YOU KILLED PEOPLE DEVIN YOU ARE A FUCKING MURDER AND I LOST TOO OF THE MOST IMPORTANT PEOPLE IN MY LIFE THAT NIGHT. YOU WANT TO KNOW HOW LONG IT TOOK FOR ME TOO GET BACK TO NORMAL. HUH WELL IM STILL NOT NORMAL. I STILL HAVE NIGHTMARE I CANT BARELY DRIVE PASS THAT FUCKING CROSS WITHOUT BURSTING INTO TEARS. I CANT EVEN LOOK AT A BABY WITHOUT THINKING ABOUT THAT!! I MAY NOT BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN BECAUSE OF YOU!!! EVER!! I WONT HAVE A FAMILY A HUSBAND TO PREPARE MEALS FOR, THE SOUND OF CHILDRENS FEET PITTERING PATTERING ON THE FLOOR. I MAY NEVER GET TO SEE THEM GROW UP AND GO TO COLLEGE TO SEE THEM START A FAMILY!!!!!! I MAY NEVER BE a grandmother" i dont scream the last part as it finally hits me of everything i had really lost that night

"AND WHAT DID YOU LOSE? HUH"

"Dean". he whispers it so softly that i almost didnt hear him.