Depression Diary

Friends?

November 9, 2016

Friends?

  Since when are you, the group of people that I've only come to know this year, my friends from the eighth grade.

  If your definition of friend is someone who excludes you from a group of friends you use to hang out with for a month or so over an opinion that you promised to respect? Or is a friend someone who is judgmental, tells you what to wear, whether or not guys will like you wearing a black shirt over a pink one?

  What about the time where you constantly contradict the words that come out of your mouth?

  Oh.

I'm sorry.

Was I too honest?

  Good, because that's how I've always been and something you've dreaded since the moment we met again.

  If you ever consider me choosing other people's opinion who I can agree on most of the time, people who I know better than you, then consider yourself to finally get the fucking wake up call you've always needed. Because I won't stick through anymore bullshit and lies with you.

  This isn't a farewell, because we never were friends to begin with.

No.

Not at all.

  I wouldn't hesitate to choose those I know better, those who's colors I've seen by their opinions, actions and character over that of a group of friends who I never considered myself apart of because when I did actually believe we were becoming friends, you did me the favor by providing the boundaries that I was silly to cross.

  But this time I won't make the same mistake.

No.

I've learned, grown and come farther along than to fall into your trap where I'd be running in circles around your little fingers.

I'm done.

And I hope you can understand, even if it's breaking the respect and trust you once held for me. Whatever the cost, I don't fucking care anymore.

  That is my goodbye...

Until next time.