Stuck out of Orbit

Chapter 5 | Because You're a Flight Risk

I shove everything to the floor, the panic getting to me. My room a mess, my closet dishevelled, my dresser emptied and my pulse beating a mile a minute. I frantically search for my phone, my fingers grasping at air, shaking with stress and exertion. I press Indy's FaceTime icon, waiting impatiently for her to pick up.

"Yup." Comes the nonchalant reply.

"I think I'm having a mental breakdown can you please come over." Ever since my breakdown last week, Indy and Nova have been walking on ice chips, scared that anything will trigger me. So when the screen shakes, I know that Indy is racing to the door.

"On my way." And she hangs up.

"What on earth happened in here?" Someone cries out as the door to my room opens. Mom, dad and the boys are gone for the weekend and I'm lying on the floor in nothing but a housecoat, sweat covering my body, my eyes and lips swollen and my fingers bleeding from where I've unconsciously gnawed at the skin.

"Someone had the audacity to ask me on a date. I don't know what to wear, I don't know where we're going, and I have to look cute in an hour which is impossible because I don't know where we're going and what to wear and I'm scared and I-" Indy lifts me to a sitting position.

"Get in the shower. I'll do the rest." She thrusts a towel into my hands and shoves me out into the hall. I race into the washroom, strip down and turn on the water, waiting for the steam to rise. My arms and legs are shaking and I step into the shower carefully. It's a shock to my system but I graciously accept the constant noise as a distraction from my thoughts.

"Here." Indy hands me my purple grey skirt, with red and black striped thigh high socks before shoving me back into the washroom and I change gratefully, not liking the idea of picking clothes for myself. I open the door and an arm pushes a bra, grey tank top, and grey wool cardigan vest thing. Adding some anti-perspirant to complete the look I step back into my room.

"What are these?" Indy glares at me accusingly as though I've committed some form of high treason.

"They're notes." She flips through my small wire bound notebook.

"And why?"

"So I know what to do." I reply as though the answer is obvious.

"You're so clueless sometimes."

"What?"

"You don't need these." She rips the pages out of my notebook. I cry out in anguish and fear. I hold the pages of my work and tears spring from the corner of my eye.

"Why would you do that? I needed those."

"No, what you need is to finish getting ready. You only have twenty minutes left." My heart starts trying to find an escape route through my rib cage. Indy pulls out a menacing looking bag and I recoil.

"Relax, it's just makeup."

"Get that stuff away from me. I hate makeup. Only a little bit of coloured lip balm." She roots through her bag and I turn to my dresser to pull out a pale shade of pink, hardly dark enough to be noticed. I swipe a little on and almost get it all over my face with the shakiness of my hands but I manage to avoid catastrophe. I glance at Indy who gives me an excited smile.

"Wait I haven't told you who asked me!"

"Trust me, I know who asked you." Her eyes widen knowingly.

"I can't do this! Please don't make me do this! I can't go. Please! I think I'm going to be sick! I'm dizzy and can't do this and please don't make me go!" I cry out, the tears blurring my vision as I blink them away.