Him. [Jake Gyllenhaal & Ryan Gosling AU]

Part 5

JAKE'S POV

It's the last night at the lake, and everyone is getting riled up. Earlier in the day, I woke up to an empty room again (who knew Ryan was such an early riser?) and I didn't even leave the room till after noon. Last night was intense for me, admitting things about my past to Ryan and admitting that I want him - and have wanted him for a long time. It scares me being this vulnerable about my feelings with someone.

Around three in the afternoon we all went swimming again, jumping off the side of the cliff into the lake. Me and Ryan raced like we always do, swimming from one side of the lake to the other. He beat me again like he always does and I blamed my chest hair for slowing me down, my body doesn't glide through the water as easily as his does. But he says I'm full of shit and he thinks it's pathetic that he can beat me at swimming when I'm from California. I guess that's true. I didn't tell him that I was distracted by how sexy his body looks gliding through the water.

Now the sun has gone down and everyone is inside, blasting music and smoking weed. They all have the lights dim and the TV on and all the guys are spread out on the couches and in the kitchen, sitting on counters. Jamie pulls out a bottle of tequila and Ryan is the first one to take a shot. Great, I think, knowing he'll be drunk within minutes.

Ryan is wearing a black tank top that shows off the tattoos on his left arm. He's also still wearing his navy blue swim trunks that cup his ass so perfectly. I changed into my black sweats and a grey polo shirt, and my hair is still damp from showering.

I walk over to the couch and sit next to Blake, who is lighting a joint. "Seriously though dude, you should've seen the tits on this chick though," Blake says to Leo, as he puffs on his joint.

I glance up at Ryan as all the guys laugh and argue over which chicks they are hooking up with are hotter. "Ryan, you're seeing that one girl right? The one with the great ass and big tits? What's her name?" Jamie asks and I perk my head up, looking at Ryan.

"We were never a couple," Ryan says, "I just hooked up with her a few times."

"I'm so jealous dude, that girl is one of the hottest girls I've ever seen," Jamie says and I feel my stomach sinking.

"Yeah she was pretty hot," Ryan says, and I stare at him but he won't look at me. I know it's stupid, but I can feel myself burning with jealousy. I know Ryan was hooking up with this girl long before the party and before anything happened between us, but I still feel sick to my stomach even thinking about him hooking up with someone else.

I glance up at Ryan as he grabs the bottle of tequila and pours himself another shot. He glances up at me before he quickly downs the shot and starts pouring another. "Whoa slow down there Ryan," Leo says. "We all know how quickly tequila hits you."

"It's our last night here give me a break," Ryan says, before downing another shot.

"Yeah fuck off Leo," Blake says. "Take out your tampon and take a hit," he says, passing him the joint.

I'm still sipping my beer, and I lean back against the couch and look up at Ryan. He's sitting directly across from me, on the other side of the glass table in between us. He takes one more shot of tequila before wincing and grabbing a lime and sucking down hard on it. He looks up at me as he sucks on the lime, and I smile.

Ryan leans back on the couch, his cheeks flushed. Our friends carry on their conversation around us, and I chime in from time to time but all of my attention is focused solely on Ryan. He keeps licking his lips as he's looking over at me, and his eyes are seductive. His eyes are practically glued to me, and he won't look away even for a second, even when I do. His stare is so fucking intense and intimidating. He reaches down and tugs on the ends of his swim trunks, readjusting himself in his shorts, and I notice his thick erection pressing against his swim trunks. The lights are so low in this room that I don't think anyone else notices, but I feel my heart beating like crazy in my chest at the thought of Ryan being so horny in front of everyone.