Him. [Jake Gyllenhaal & Ryan Gosling AU]

Part 12

JAKE'S POV

NOVEMBER

Ryan looks pale as we get off the airplane. He hasn't said much since early this morning when we found out his Father passed away. We booked a flight as soon as possible and now it's late afternoon on the Friday after Thanksgiving and the airport is impossibly crowded. He said he didn't need me to come but he looks completely broken and there's no way I was going to let him deal with this alone. I insisted I was coming and that was that. We boarded a plane to Canada a couple hours ago, and now here we are. Even though I've been friends with Ryan for years, I've never been to his hometown in Canada. He's always been very private about his family.

We pull up in front of his Mom's house and she opens the door as we are walking up and pulls Ryan into a tight embrace, cradling his head. She looks at me over Ryan's shoulder as she hugs him and she looks surprised to see me. I guess he forgot to mention to her that I was coming.

"Hi Donna," I say, holding out my arms for a hug after she's finished hugging Ryan. "I'm so sorry for your loss."

"Thank you, Jake," she says, wrapping her arms around me. "I wasn't expecting you to be here for this."

"I'm sorry, I just couldn't let Ryan go through this alone. I'm his best friend and I want to be here for him," I say, as a way of explaining myself.

"I understand. Thank you, you're a good friend," she says, and we both make our way into the house.

We find out his Dad went into cardiac arrest after he got high. His Dad was only 58 and he died before he even made it to the hospital. Ryan looks pale the entire time his Mom is explaining what happened to us and my heart hurts for him. I know he was never particularly fond of his Father but I can't imagine what he's going through right now. She mentions that she's planning for the funeral that will be held in a few days and she would like Ryan to speak at the funeral. Ryan doesn't say anything the entire time she talks, he's just staring off into space like he can't believe this is real.

After the long talk with his mother we are both exhausted and I'm laying blankets on the couch in the basement. I can hear muffled conversation coming from the kitchen, where Ryan is saying goodnight to his Mom, but I can't make out any specific words. I move a little closer to the staircase as I'm putting on a pillow case and I hear his Mom ask: "does Jake really need to be here for this?" I feel my chest tighten and my heart beat quicken. She doesn't want me here. I hear Ryan start to argue with her and tell her he needs me here and she says this is a family time and he should be spending more time with his family right now, and Ryan argues that I'm his best friend and he needs me around right now. He tells her to stop being selfish and consider what he needs. My heart constricts at the idea of Ryan needing me. I want to wrap my arms around him and never let go.

I hear footsteps walking towards the basement so I quickly walk back over to the couch and try to act casual as I lay down on all the blankets I laid out. Ryan walks down the stairs, wearing grey sweatpants and a black polo shirt and somehow manages to look so fucking sexy without even trying.

"Did you hear any of that?" he asks innocently as he sits on the end of the couch by my feet.

"Hear any of what?" I ask, feigning ignorance.

"Don't bull shit a bull shitter Jake," he says, smirking.

"Do you think I should leave? I just wanted to be here for you because I can't imagine what you're going through and I thought..."

"Of course, I want you here," he says, cutting me off. "My Mom is just acting crazy."

"Are you sure? I know you should be with your family right now and I don't want to interfere with that or intrude," I say.