Found

Alone

Dear Diary,

Weeks have passed since Damon's departure. 7 to be exact. I'm miserable. I miss him so much. We talk on the phone for hours at least twice a week. He's really busy and sounds like he is having a blast with his studies at Harvard. I'm so happy that he is enjoying himself. I've tried to keep myself busy too don't worry. I have been hanging out with Bonnie and Caroline for quite a while now. They are amazing and I love them, always my best friends. Though it doesn't mean I forgot about Damon. I miss him so much the pain and emptiness is unbearable and it's killing me. I'm literally EMPTY. In biology class the seat next to me is vacant. Is it okay to laugh again? I hope so. Aunt Jenna is asking me every once and a while how i'm putting up. I think she's concerned about me but i'm okay. I'm holding myself up pretty well right now. I'm surprised. Everyone keeps asking me how i'm doing. I'm fine, somewhat for now I think. It's okay, people lose other. I still talk to Damon. But I miss him.

That's all I kept on saying repeatedly in my entries. How I felt empty. I did. Nothing more. It's like there is a huge hole in my heart in which Damon use to exist in. This sucks. I have been crying for hours on random days of the week finding myself wounded for some odd reason. But what really worried me was... that me and Damon didn't talk at all for the past 2 weeks. Is he okay? I hope so. I mean maybe he's just busy and all caught up in his studies. I don't want to pull him away from that, I just want to know he's safe and sound. Want to know he's secure because it's killing me that I haven't heard anything from him from anyone. Kinda worried me but then again he's probably fine. Yeah, FINE.

I got up from my seat by my window and shoved my diary in my handbag once again like any other day. Today was Friday. I remember when me and Damon would always go over to his house and make some random foods for dinner and then dance around like we're at a frat party. Booze was included sometimes when we were both in the wild mood. Shit. Thinking of him again. Sometimes I can't even help myself, I don't even realize myself doing so. I'm going crazy.

I walked downstairs yelled behind my shoulder telling Jenna I was going out to the grill. Might as well spend Friday night somewhere fun. I got into my car and slowly started driving into the blue letting my ears soak in the soft stroke of the music playing on the radio, paying close attention to every single lyric sang by the artist.

"Give me love like her, cause lately I've been waking up alone. Paint splattered teardrops on my shirt. Told ya I'd let them go. And that I'll fight my corner, maybe tonight I'll call ya after my blood, turns into alcohol. No I just wanna hold ya. Give a little time to me, or burn this out. We'll play hide and seek to turn this around. All I want is the taste that your lips allow. My, my, my, my, oh give me love. My, my, my, my give me love."

My heart sang along the melody as I felt the burn in my eyes. I blinked as the tears rolled down my cheeks.