Clouded

Story time

Skye's Perspective

I looked into his eyes, almost lost in the ocean blues within. I could tell he felt guilty for having to ask, but there was also a certain determination about him that made me feel a little uncertain. He was obviously curious, who wouldn't be? I vanished out of thin air, one day I was sat with Mark as we played video games and ate ice cream, the next.. well.. I had been declared dead..

For the moment, I reached over to take a sip of the water that sat on the bedside table, trying to collect any coherent thought before I answered. I had to be careful what I said, I didn't want to lie to him, but I didn't want to tell him everything that had happened.. how would he look at me after that? would he even look at me?

"Skye, I promise, that whatever may have happened wasn't your fault, we do need to inform the police about you being found though and it's better to tell me now rather than me having to find out later anyway.."

He was right, he would find out everything anyway and then it wouldn't matter anymore.

All this trouble because I hesitated for a moment, a single moment of weakness after all these years and I'm punished once more. Karma can go fuck itself, I didn't deserve this.. or did I? Maybe I did, maybe if I had done something sooner, maybe I could've saved Mark.. and maybe, if I had just ran that little bit faster towards the cliff edge, I might have found peace. But no, here I am, tormenting Jack like the ghost of Christmas past.

He, of all people definitely didn't deserve this. But.. he did deserve the truth.

"Where to start.." I mumbled, slightly afraid. I'm sure he could see the fear that clouded my eyes as well.

"How about.. at the beginning. When you were at the orphanage?" he prompted, trying to be supportive.

I merely nodded slowly, before I started to explain.

"W..well, I was dropped off there.. after.. after Mark died..

I paused, frozen in time, unable to think of what to say.

"It's okay.. take your time"

"Um.. well I had been there a few days and.. a man came.. ( That bastard.. ) he.. said he wanted to adopt a child, me.. specifically. I didn't really complain, they checked the address I would be living at, checked the family I would be staying with, even the school placement.. It seemed a little too perfect to happen so soon, the house was in a beautiful area, near the city, where we.. used to live and before I had even stayed at the orphanage a week, I was shipped off.."

I took a little breather and continued as I stared down at my feet that dangled off the bed, I couldn't make eye contact, even though I could feel his eyes on me. I pretended not to notice and fiddled with my hands and the sleeve of the top I was wearing.

"They.. said they would check on me in a week to see how I was settling in, they were nice people, though I didn't really appreciate it at the time.. I was still upset with the whole situation.. and, anyway.. the first week I stayed with the man and his "wife"..

I made quotation marks with my fingers.

"..who I only met once or twice..  she wasn't so bad, and they both seemed normal enough at the first, I didn't really pay attention, too wrapped up in my own mind and before I noticed something seemed off, it was too late.."

I sighed a little, remembering how naive I had been.

"The people from the orphanage came to see me, this was at the end of my first week there which I had found completely fine, they fed me, let me have a bed to sleep in, made sure I was okay.. and I was supposed to start school on the next term. They asked me how I was, if I was alright with the placement and if the family were okay. I said they were fine.. nice even.. and they.. they said they wouldn't need to visit anymore, that if there were any issues, to call them.. and they left"

I inhaled a shaky breath and Jack carefully held my hand in his own and I could feel his warmth, it made me relax slightly but I was still tense.

The best of it was over..