after the sun sets

Chapter 5

  The vow

My brother came over the following day of the "we're broke" incident (I named it because I kind of felt like I had to. Things like my brother fighting with father are really unusual, they should get documented), filled his suitcase with every cloth he could load in and gave me a glare on the way out (Per usual...only this time his glare meant something. It meant that he knew but he wouldn't tell. I really don't know why he didn't eventually tell. The brother I know would have never let a chance to destroy me go away).

My father crashed the whiskey bottle onto the kitchen bench five minutes after my brother's departure and silence veiled the house again. I haven't seen my brother since then and without him here the only sound in the house is the sound of the TV.

I survived the past month with, to my surprise, minimal injuries [mainly because my dad was snoring 23/7 (that one remaining hour he was getting drunk)] and by visiting pretty much every single park with Jared. Sometimes, when we weren't bored, we would even go to 2 or 3 or, well, 4 parks in a row, and there aren't that many parks in Merton so it was definitely easy to run out of places, given that I have already visited more than half of them.

Jared proved to, at least coincidentally, be a person I can stand (a privilege of his) and have real fun with, something I haven't had in ages (a privilege of mine). I hadn't actually interacted with a person in this expanse the past few years, and I had forgotten how it is like. I can assure you it's great and it certainly is my new addiction, scratch that, my first addiction. I finally get to know my self and get to know another person and, to add up to all that, I get to know the world. I can eventually share the opinions I have gathered from all these years of book reading. How cool is that?

Now, don't get me wrong. I still am this pessimist girl that hates her life and wants to leave this freaking place forever but, for the time being, I don't hate all of it. I don't hate the nights, I love the nights. In the nights, I feel free, I feel like a complete other person, severed from my gloomy identity, able to break the chains of hatred that pull me back and pin me on the wall of nothingness and live.

As we exit the patisserie I pull the box out of the bag. I am tempted to wolf down this chocolate cake right here, right now, but I stop myself at the last minute.

"You're really not that patient, are you?" Jared asks as his trying to contain his laughter.

"I thought you'd know by now". I walk towards the bench at the opposite of the shop, sit down and take the cake out of the beige box. I smell the beautiful chocolate scent and I take the first bite. A sweet taste deluges my mouth.

I can see from the corner of my eye the way he looks at me.

"You're really weird" I hear him say but I don't pay much attention, my complete focus is on this delicious thing I hold in my hands.

"Haven't you ever eaten a chocolate cake before?"

"Oh, I have, but it has been a while" I muffle the words between my chews.

He stares at me while I devour this piece of art. He doesn't even try to talk to me. He already knows that my response will be nothing more than a 3 letter word. When I finally gobble the chocolate paradise I hear his voice.

"So what do you want to do tomorrow?"

"I don't know. I don't even know other places except the parks we've already been to, my house, my former school..." I'm so relieved that I actually remembered I have lied to him about that. I'll probably have to tell him soon, though. I mean, the summer break will be over soon "...so there's nothing I can help with".

"But you're from here. You surely know some places"

"Nope. Not one."

"Well, I'll search when I return home. I'm certain Google Maps is much less useless than you."

"Thank you" I squint my eyes at him. "We don't have to hang out everyday. You know that right?" I continue as I stand up and throw the now empty box of the cake and the bag in a bin near by.

"I thought we were friends. That's what friends do."

"I don't really make friends" I say as I sit down again beside him.

"Oh, don't worry" he flicks his hand before me. "There's always a first time for everything."

"Yeah, I do believe there is but, the thing is that I don't like you enough.." I'm trying to sound as bitchy as I can. Seriously, I remind me of those girls that used to mock me in middle school. Fortunately, they grew up and going to high school has somewhat changed them.

"That is not true" he interjects and points his finger at me.

"...And I just don't make friends" I go on pretending I haven't heard him.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you but we spent pretty much every night together. What do you call our relationship?"

"Nonexistent?"

He lets out an amused laugh and then he rolls his eyes.

"Okay" I sigh "I guess we can be friends..."

"We already are".

"...But, you have to promise me something."

"Maybe..."

"We will only be friends the nights. If you ever see me across the street during the day, you won't call my name, you won't come and talk to me, you'll simply turn your face to the opposite direction and continue with your life. And...if you ever notice something off don't ask questions about it"

"What do you mean by off?"

"Well, what I just asked you is something strange, off, don't ask questions about it, I won't answer them".

"You just did".

"Shut up" I squint my eyes at him.

"You're honestly so weird."

I raise my eyebrows waiting for his answer.

"Okay okay." He raises his hands before him "God, I swear you can kill me with this look of yours. I vow to you m'lady. When in the day I shall never approach you and talk to you. I will only turn my head and act as if we're strangers only once met under the twilight."

"Nice addition" I smile.

"Thank you" He smirks and he bows. Well, kind of. He's still sitting.

He pulls a napkin out of his bag and he gives it to me. "You really need that" he says and points at his cheeks.

I wipe the chocolate syrup off of my face with the embarrassment hitting my cheeks.