Life Lost and Found

27: Moments That Change Things

Madeline was drying her hair when she heard the front door open downstairs. She knew who it was. She skipped the last of the drying and pulled on a shirt. She paused in front of the mirror as she passed it, then went to confront him in the office.

"Oh, there you are," Rob said, barely glancing up. He was gathering the last of his belongings from his desk. "I just finished reserving our flights. We won't be able to sit together, but I got the best seats I could on short notice. This is going to be so incredible."

Madeline said nothing.

"Do you have a bag or anything? You might want to—" He finally noticed. "Lizzie, what the hell?"

"I've been getting that a lot lately."

Madeline, who was feeling a little more connected to herself now, checked her outfit again. She was wearing jeans and a white t-shirt with a giant green 1-Up mushroom. She had on the running shoes from Sydney, some ladybug earrings Sofie had given her, and a pair of wide leather bracelets Gina had made her for Christmas. She wore makeup, but only a little and just for highlights. Her necklace was on the outside.

Oh, and her hair was almost the right color. And the color was almost even. Acceptable, for her first try with a dye kit, though it still needed a little work.

She watched Rob struggle to process. So this was what a brain crash looked like from the outside. "What happened to your old look?" he asked.

"This is my old look. Sort of. Old look 2.0, I guess? I might have downloaded an emergency software update or something. I'm not sure this one's any less buggy, to be honest. It might be worse."

"O-kay," he said, annoyed. "Let me try asking that again, and here's hoping for an answer that makes sense. Why did you change your look?"

Her eyes darted around the room while she searched for an answer. "I... don't know."

"You don't know?" he asked, incredulous. "One would think that you, of all people, would know why you made a very deliberate decision such as this."

"You'd think, wouldn't you?" she agreed. "You'd think that. But I'm kind of..." She gestured wildly with her hands as she searched for the words. "I'm kind of an anxiety-tastic, mixed-emotional clusterfeel right now. I'm not completely sure what's going on."

He looked her over one more time, clearly not super thrilled. "I can see that. Well, whatever. I guess we can talk about it later. Do you have a bag or something for your stuff here?" He continued packing.

She looked at the still-messy room but gave no response.

Rob stuffed an iPad in his bag, then noticed she hadn't moved. "You... you're not having second thoughts."

"Maybe. Maybe I am. I used the word 'clusterfeel', didn't I?"

"I thought that was a weird word for 'excited to be leaving with my boyfriend'. And you cannot be having second thoughts. I already told them you were coming."

She gaped at him. "Then I guess... I guess you'd better call them back!"

"You guess what?" Rob dropped his bag on the floor. "Oh, I get it. Gina and Sofie convinced you to stay. I saw them confront you. What did they say?"

"Surprisingly little, actually." Which made sense. She was, after all, only a charity case to them, and a disappointing one at that. They would have her replaced quickly enough. "Nice of you, by the way, to tell everyone that I had already decided to go. Since when does 'I'll think about it' mean 'sure, count me in'?"

"Is that what this is about? So I assumed the whole opportunity-of-a-lifetime thing would be enough to convince you. Was I wrong?"

She cast around her brain for an answer. "No."