Aftermath

Chapter 7

Shepard woke in darkness.

She waited, tense, expecting the gunfire, the screams, the hot red beam of death. But it didn't come. Instead there was quiet with only the sound of soft breathing nearby.

She turned her head to the side to see Liara sleeping against her. Her blue skin exposed from the waist up, her arm draped possessively over Shepard's stomach. Shepard took a deep breath and let it out slowly. It was over. She was alive. She was with Liara. You mean everything to me, she could remember herself telling Liara before she left her the last time. It was true still, and always would be.

She allowed herself a smile, watching Liara sleep.

Their first joining once reaching Liara's suite had been fast and filled with urgency. Liara had stripped her of the damned Quarian suit quickly and they tumbled into bed and consumed each other. The moment Shepard felt Liara's consciousness touch hers through the Asari bonding she was overwhelmed with a sense of longing and desire, loss and terrible joy, relief and possession. The contact was intense both physically and emotionally.

The second time, soon after the first, was slower, deliberate and explored a depth of joining they had yet to experience together. Shepard could feel Liara's questions in her own consciousness. She wanted to know what Shepard had seen, what she had felt, what she had suffered. Shepard opened herself fully, holding nothing back. She had decided on her flight to Thessia that holding back the pain and fear would only get in their way. She wasn't used to being vulnerable in this way and she didn't want to burden Liara with her fears, but with so many other things between them, she decided her own fears would not be one of them.

Liara took it all in and after they climaxed together and Shepard looked into her eyes, she found them filled with tears. A mix of sadness and compassion. Liara touched Shepard's face gently. She ran a finger lightly along the fresh scar on her forehead then met her eyes again. She knew everything now. Anderson, The Illusive Man, the Catalyst AI, the choice, all of it.

"You had to choose," Liara said softly.

Shepard was suddenly back with the Catalyst AI facing her decision. She could see Earth far below, on fire. She could feel the pistol in her hand. She felt the sudden flash of heat.

Shepard blinked hard, and when she opened her eyes again, she found Liara watching her.

"It was an impossible choice," Liara said quietly. The AI had given her three choices. Control, Synthesis, or Destroy. Each was fraught with unknowns. Each would extract a cost, a sacrifice. "Not a question of who to save, but who to destroy," Liara whispered. She had put a perfect point on it. Shepard nodded, closing her eyes again. Someone else understood.

Liara kissed her gently. "You did everything you possibly could."

"What would you have chosen?" she asked Liara quietly. She wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer but the question came unbidden.

Liara looked away, reflecting. "I don't know. Until faced with death in that moment maybe we cannot know." Her eyes went back to Shepard, "You were the one tasked with that impossible choice. You shouldered that burden alone. I trust you did what was best, for as many as you could."

Shepard nodded. She suddenly felt relief. The great weight sitting on her chest since she'd woken eased a little. She had room to breathe a little deeper. Someone else knew what she'd been through. Knew of the terrible choice she'd had to make. And there was no one else in the galaxy she'd have wanted that to be but Liara.

Concern entered Liara's eyes, "Does anyone else know about the choice you had to make?"

Shepard shook her head. "No. No, it seemed too... complicated... to explain."