Hi, it's me.
Ya know, the asshole narrator.
Once upon a time there was a duckli-
Wait, I can't tell the ugly duckling?
Oh, that's why there are lawyers surrounding me!
Anyway the little duck was a very disgusting one, he decided that he would go to New York.
There he almost got ran over one thousand times.
He was almost hung outside a window of a restaurant in Chinatown.
That's when he went to work for Affleck, where he was paid 2 million dollars just for saying Affleck a bunch of times.
Wait, the Affleck bird is a goose.
Oh well, tomatoe, applesauce.
