The Fluffy Haired Boy / Joshler

Sick

        Josh ordered 2 Sonic Burgers and 2 Coca-Colas.  I fiddled my thumbs as we waited for our food in silence. I tried to act like I hadn't heard those three words. They're just in a platonic, friendly, not sexual, way, I tried to convince myself. I coughed.

        The more I though about the last thing Josh spoke, the more warm I began to feel. Not like "visiting Grandma's" more like "the guy I'm secretly in love with just said he loves me". Yet here is 'Mr. Cool-Dude-I don't sweat a thing' over here humming along to "Hit Me Baby One More Time". Whilst I'm in the corner profusely sweating. 

        He hands me my food and soon after starts to claw into his own. Josh ate like an animal. He looked like a food deprived child from the Andes that has never seen the light of day. His mouth stuffed and reaching for his drink he spat out, "They only feed marching band kids Apples and Water." I looked at him. He looked like a complete idiot. When he spoke lettuce and bread would fly out of his mouth and he would gesture whatever thing he had in his hand at me. I started laughing at him hysterically. This then caused me to spew lettuce and bread too.

        Josh started laughing. We made the car shake as we rocked back and forth in laughter. When we both finished laughing; and our food, we threw our things away and started heading back to Lewis Center. It was a long drive. 

        We pulled into Josh's driveway. "Shit!" Josh mumbled under his breath, "My parents are home. Damn it!" He hit the steering wheel. We got out and walked into his house.

        His mother sat on the couch and watched us walk in. She had disappointed look on her face. "Joshua, what did you do at school today?" Sarcasm dragged along her words. "Nothing," Josh said staring at the ground with his hands in his pockets. 

        I stood awkwardly next to him. I saw Josh was picking at the blood under his nails. "Bill! He's home!"  His father walked in after. He stumbled into the living room carrying a newspaper. He sat next to Josh's mom.

       Bill looked up from his new paper and looked at me. He leaned over to his wife and whispered, "Who's the weird skinny kid?" She shrugged. Bill looked at Josh and gestured the newspaper at me; as if to ask, "Who the hell is this?" "Tyler." Josh said as he rocked back and forth on his heels.

        "So I hear you got into an argument with some kids, hmm?" His mom asked eyeing Josh. Josh replied calmly, "Yup, just an argument." "I raised you to be a well, respectful, good, Christian, boy and this is what I get? Mercilessly beating a boy half to death," his mother was yelling now. Close to crying. "Joshua, I love you and you give me this? This boy said he didn't touch you. You broke 5 of his ribs, dislocated his jaw, shattered his left knee cap, broke his nose, and caused him internal bleeding! Joshua why?!?" Josh exhaled loudly. 

"Mom, I'm sorry." 

"Sorry?!? Does sorry fix anything? No!"

        Through the yelling I heard a faint voice, "Tyler, come. Sit down, make yourself at home!" Bill was pointing to a chair and smiling. Thank the Lord!, I thought. I sat down as the mother and son continue to fight. 

"Mom. Just calm down please."

"See this is why you shouldn't listen to that devilish music."

"What?"

She pulls out from behind a pillow Dookie by Green Day

"What is this? Green Day?"

"Mom, it's just music."

"Music is provocative! The pastor will hear about this! Mark my words Joshua!"

        At this point Josh and his dad were both giggling at the woman's ignorance. "Laura! I'll handle this," Bill waved off his wife. "Josh. Dude. You can't kick a person's butt just because they made you mad. C'mon. We'll talk later tonight. In the mean time, I'm taking your car away." Josh's mouth dropped open. "But.." Josh uttered. "Keys..Now!" Josh's dad erupted. Josh handed over his keys. 

        We walked to Josh's room. It was tidy. It smelled nice. Like lilies and fresh laundry. Josh closed the door behind us. We could still hear his mom complaining to his dad. I sat on his bed. It was softer then what meets the eye. 

Josh sat next to me, "Sorry." 

"For what?" 

"My mom," he replied

"Dude, you saved my ass though."

 I tried to cheer him up, "Internal bleeding? Who does that? It's sick"

We both giggled. "Yeah I guess." 

        Josh's smiled made me smile. This moment. It was amazing.

"It was pretty sick though," Josh chuckled

"It was sick," I replied

"Sick!" Josh stood up.

"Sick!" I stood up.

"SICK!" Josh stomped his foot on the ground.

"SICK!" I stomped my foot on the ground.

"SICK!!" We said simultaneously and high-fived with both hands.

        We both chortled until our diaphragms felt like they were going to burst. I was laying on Josh's bed laughing and Josh was on the floor laughing his ass off. "Wh-*laugh* why are we *laugh* like *snort*this!?" Josh asked. "I don't know?!" I responded barely breathing correctly.

        After we had recovered, Josh's dad drove me home. I left my house at 7 pm to go to the game. Since that day I realized one thing.

        We're so sick.