perfectionist

fourteen

yoongi's pov

-

I hate getting close to anyone. I did that with taehyung, and that didn't end well. I thought we were perfect, but everything fell to shit. I trusted him with everything I had, and he betrayed me. i mean, what could I expect? freshman are immature, they don't know any better. but apparently, I don't either, because I put all my trust into a freshman. I really nice, attractive freshman. a freshman with an opaque mask.

that's why I don't let anybody in. no matter how hard they try, I won't let them in. my walls have been okay for the past couple years, but not until a certain junior finds their way into my heart. that's when I confuse myself.

***

"hey, I met this taehyung kid everyone's talking about. your ex, Jimin's secret guide to yoongi, all that," Hoseok says. he's sitting on his heels between me and jimin. "oh, joy. he's great isn't he," I ask sarcastically. "yep. he's hot, though. maybe hotter than you Jimin," Hoseok says and Jimin rolls his eyes. "so what's the chemistry between you and Taehyung?" I ask. "well we kind of.. sort of.. got drunk, and y'know, made out.. might've fucked," Hoseok says and I stare at him. it makes me feel weird to think Jung Hoseok's dick has been inside the same hole mine once was. I shiver in disgust. "Why are you so fucking squeamish?" Jimin asks. "well when you shoved your fucking dick inside my mouth, it kind of set something off, you rapist!" I yell, slamming my palms on the table in front of me. we're the center of attention of everyone around us at this point. Hoseok bursts out laughing and falls to the floor. jimin and I have what seems like a glare-off before I stand up, grab his wrist, and pull him behind me. I travel as far away from the loud cafeteria as I can and find a dark, empty classroom. I pull Jimin into it and lock the door behind us. the light source is coming from the daylight streaming through the window. I stare at jimin, and I notice how pretty his skin looks when it's being contrasted between the dark and sunlight. "why?" I ask, my voice cracking. "Why what?" He says, clearly confused. I feel myself erupt. "Why won't you leave me alone? why me? why am I so perfect for you? why can't you see what my fucking boundaries are? can you not fucking tell I've been broken before? there are fucking limits. can you not fucking tell I'm not ready to have my dick inside of you? why are you fucking doing this to me? why are you torturing me?" I say, my voice getting louder, stepping closer to the brunette every second. "yoongi-" "Why won't you leave me alone?" I say, and my voice is barely a whisper. our faces are only a couple inches a part by now. "maybe I don't want to," He whispers, taking a step closer. "Why not?" I say, and everything feels like it's moving in slow motion. "because.. you're worth too much to lose.." He says and I can barely hear him. he leans forward as slowly as ever, and I still csnt render what's happening. it takes me a full 10 seconds to realize his lips are on my own. this time, I don't feel disgust. I feel something new. a warm, calm feeling mixed with excitement and soemthing I can't comprehend. he tilts his head and I finally kiss him back, loving the way his lips feel against my own. his hands are on the back of my neck and in my hair, and mine are settled on his waist and just below his chin. I can smell him, and he smells clean and fresh. welcoming.

but something about the smell alarms me, and it brings me back into harsh reality. I back him up against a wall, and I hear a thudding sound as our bodies collide with it. his hand trails under my shirt, and his cold fingers against my warm stomach set me off. I pull away, deathly afraid. "no," I breathe.  I don't want to go farther, not yet. I lean forward and kiss his forehead once before backing up. I leave the room without saying anything and I run, I run out of the school and to some place, I don't pay attention.

-

Jimin's pov :))

-

I stare blankly at the dark room. i can still feel yoongi's soft lips and cold hands, and I want them back. I miss what i never really had. all I want is to be mad at him, but I can't. i think back to what he said earlier. did he really think I just wanted to break him? I grip at my hair and bite my lip.

park jimin, you fucked up.

-

ah hello I hope you enjoyed that real** yoonmin kiss :) now I've got 2 plans for the rest of this ff and one of them involves a plot twist that i really want to do, but idk if I should. it might add on a couple more chapters so yea idk idk idk tje other way im.nit real sure I'm gonna need the ff but I'll see.

plot twist w happy ending or just regular happy ending lmao

anyway is it coincidental that my brother and Yoongi have the same birthday, except yoongi's a year older than my brother? lmao woah