The Art of Living

[27] Principles

On Thursday afternoon, Ellie only had a meeting with her supervisor, nothing exciting. After that she went home to drop off her backpack, but she didn't stay much longer. It was already afternoon, but there was still enough time left of the day to go out and make use of the weather to take some more pictures for her project. The task was to capture daily life. In whatever way. 

That was why she had taken so many pictures in and around Hyde Park, because it was her daily life. It wasn't the most creative idea but Ellie got some great pictures out of it so it should be good. On top of that her supervisor was fine with the idea. However she needed more sunny pictures, because even that was daily life, as rare as it could be. 

She put some new film into her camera and then went outside. On the short walk to the park she kept her eyes open for any good motives, but there was nothing that immediately caught her attention. She had to admit that that was partly also because her thoughts kept straying to a certain curly haired man, like they had so often in the past days. 

In the park, however, that was different, luckily. There was a lot going on and it was easier for Ellie to focus and she had plenty of opportunities to add to her project. Because she was so busy, the time flew by quickly, and it got darker much sooner than she had expected. 

Ellie hadn't even really noticed how the shadows had gotten longer and longer and the details were getting harder and harder to see. Neither had she noticed how her hunger was getting stronger. It was only when her stomach was grumbling loudly that she realised how much time had passed, and how hungry she was, and how dark it had gotten all around her. 

She noticed how occasionally she was so immersed in what she was doing that the world around her became secondary. Even if actually she was paying a lot of attention to the world around her. "Oh wow, I should probably .." She looked around and stopped talking again immediately. It was a little stupid to talk to herself because no one was around who would listen to her. 

She was alone - again, like always, and somehow she didn't really like it that much, just like the past days. And just like the past days, there was one person in particular that she would like by her side. That was nothing new to her anymore. But the chances that that would happened were very small. 

Because she still was certain that she would never call or even visit him. She didn't have the courage for that. She'd much rather just enjoy thinking about him. He was making her feel funny, in the best possible way, and there was something about that feeling that she loved, that made her feel like she couldn't get enough of thinking about him. But when she thought she saw him there in Hyde Park, sitting on one of the benches, she was quite sure she was going crazy.

If she seriously started seeing Brian everywhere now, then she officially needed help. No matter how much she enjoyed thinking about him, no matter how busy Lynn and Mary were they had to help her, because she felt completely lost in that situation. What was she supposed to do? 

She glanced at the man on the bench again. He did look suspiciously like Brian. Even though his face was hidden, his hair and the way he was sitting there reminded her of Brian. She was going completely insane, wasn't she? She hadn't originally planned to walk past that bench but she just couldn't help herself. 

She had the suspicion that if she didn't determine for sure whether it really was Brian, she wouldn't have a calm minute until she saw him again. Because he would be even more on her mind, if that was possible, and then she might actually not be able to control herself anymore and either call or visit Brian. And that wouldn't be good. Especially because the guy probably wasn't even Brian and it was just her mind playing tricks on her. She just had to be sure of that.