Sorry that this fanfiction has a slow start but please stick with it! You meet Harry in chapter 4 so please stick with it!! Love you x💕
Saturday, my favourite day. Especially as there is no school. And what made it extra special is that my step-dad has just bought me a car, which means I can go wherever I want. I woke up at about 8:15am from the sound of my iPhone going off with a text alert, it was my best friend Kate. The text said "Heyy babe, sorry for the early wake up call but I had to wake you up, you sleep in so late sometimes and you know what's going on today right? We are going to the Gower in Wales with Mila, Sophie and Bella and hopefully see those gorgeous lifeguards again! Ok so you'll pick me up at my house at 10am and we'll meet the rest of the girls down in the car park, remember to bring your towel, we don't want a repeat of last time! Alright see you later babe love ya!" To be honest I had sort of forgotten that we were going to the beach, I just have so much on my plate lately with helping my mum and Daves wedding and it's a lot of work. I mean of course I want to go and those lifeguards are really really fit but I am so tired with exams just finishing and the wedding and it's just too much. I lay in bed in my vest top and baggy shorts not wanting to get up, then I hear a knock at my bedroom door.
"Come in" I said.
"Good morning princess, good nights sleep, no bad dreams?" My mum asked while walking in and sitting on the bed beside me.
"No none at all stop worrying I'm fine trust me!"
"Alright sweetie, your up early, meeting up with anyone today, any boys?" My mum asked, such a typical thing for her to say.
"Noo just the girls we are driving down to the Gower so I better get ready."
"Ok Daisy, I'll go and make you breakfast pumpkin."
"Thank youuu" I said all innocent. She kissed me on the forehead and left.
My room was pretty big. It was practically all white. Old king size white vintage bed, white carpet, white walls, white dressing table and a white wardrobe.I got up and trudged towards the bathroom and stared at myself in the mirror. I looked vile. Just vile. My hair was in a massive mess all in nots and I had forgotten to take my make-up off last night so I had big panda eyes. I got my phone out of my pocket and checked it. I had 57 texts, 23 kiks and 33 SnapChats. I usually reply to them but I just couldn't be asked today so I put my phone down and undressed and popped into the shower.
"Shit." I said to myself. I had left my shampoo, conditioner, body wash and scrub in the cabinet. I got out of the shower and went and got them. Then my heart started to pound.
"I thought I had thrown them all away" I said to myself. Hidden behind my body scrub was a razor. A sharp, lonely razor. My arm started throbbing almost inviting me to pull out blades and cut. But I can't. I mustn't. I promised myself and everyone that I wouldn't so I got the razor and flushed it down my toilet which was a bit of a struggle considering it was an entire razor.
I hopped in the shower and put on some music, Sexy Can I. I loved that song and it made me feel really confident so it was a perfect choice considering I was having quite a bad day so far with the razor and all. I guess you are all wondering what's going on, so let me fill you in. It all started two years ago when my parents got a divorce and I thought it was my fault. I guess it all started to escalate from there, the hating of myself. But then three months later I was walking home from a friends house with my dog when I threw a ball for her but it landed in a bush. I went to go and get it when this drunk guy approached me. He started to touch me and I tried to get away but he was just too strong that he forced me too the floor and stripped me, and raped me. His friend soon came and did the same thing after he had finished with me. They left me there in the dirt naked, I was just so traumatised, shocked and upset that I just couldn't move. The tears were flooding out of me and my dog Jess was trying to get me up but I couldn't. My mum got so panicked as I hadn't come back that she called the police and they started a search party. I heard police coming calling my name after about four hours of just lying there that I slowly got up and got changed. I left the bush and they took me to the station where I told them what happened. My mum was also in tears but my dad and Dave who was then just my mum's boyfriend were absolutely fuming that steam was practically coming out their ears. They quickly arrested the men and they pleaded guilty and kept on saying they were just completely wasted and were really sorry. They went to jail but after the incidence I developed severe depression, anxiety and became suicidal, I also self harmed. My mum soon found out after she found me in my bathroom with blood all over the floor after I tried killing myself. I didn't die and went to a physic ward for four months. I have come over it now but I still feel very self conscious.
I showered and got out and wrapped my towel round me. I brushed my teeth and washed my face. I stared at myself in the mirror for a second. God I hated myself without make-up. I went into my bedroom and got my high waisted shorts from Urban Outfitters, my black fringed crop top from Topshop and my red and black lace bra and underwear from Victoria Secret. I sat down by my mirror dresser and got out my hair dryer and started drying my hair. My hair is so fucking thick and long it takes ages to dry, it gets so annoying that sometimes I just want to cut it all off! My hair is very long thick and brown. Once my hair was dry I got my makeup out and popped on my moisturiser and primer from Benefit. I then put on my Wake Me Up foundation, concealer and highlighter. Then I put on my Benefit Hello Flawless powder and NARS bronzer. Then I got out my Naked Eye Shadow 2 Paltet and did my eyeshadow the usual way, a shadowed look and applied my eyeliner, mascara and lip gloss. There, much better. I feel so much more confident with makeup and luckily my mum knows that so we go out makeup shopping almost every week as she wants to make me as confident as possible. My mum is still traumatised after she almost lost me. She honestly does everything she can to make me more confident. So she takes me shopping to get things that will make me more confident and pays for therapy for me by the best doctor in England which is pretty cool. My Dad and I are still close but he focuses more on getting the two men who assaulted getting a longer sentence which I appreciate but don't think is necessary. Dave on the other just carries on as normal and treats me the same which I absolutely love. It's nice as it helps me to forget about everything that has happened. I spayed on my deodorant and my Channel perfume.
I walked downstairs and saw my mum making pancakes which smelt so good.
"Wow mum these smell delicious"
"Great, cause I added a pinch of cinnamon this time and they do smell delicious."
"Well they definitely do! So what you and Dave doing today?"
"Well I thought that we would go to the bakery just to double check on the cake for the wedding and then out for lunch and shopping afterwards. Would you like to get me any thing sweetheart?"
"Well could you look out for Baby Lips cause I've run out."
"Always darling" and she kissed me and gave me my pancakes and juice.
I went into the lounge and say down and ate my breakfast while checking my messages. Most of my messages are from boys asking if I am going to this house party on the weekend. I don't really go to house parties as the last time I went to one I had a panic attack but Mila has convinced me to go to this one as she promised me that she and the girls won't leave me alone as I am worried about getting another panic attack. I check the time and realise that it was almost 10 so I got up and entered the kitchen, said bye to my mum, picked up my handbag and left in my car.
