Writings, Monolouges and More!

Moon-eyed girl

(Just started writing this and now I can't stop)

How cruel is it to fall in love with someone who you know will never return the favor? Well, that's where I am. Stuck in the four-way intersection of friends zone lane, not interested boulevard, will never be interested street and already has a boyfriend road. I was once proud of the fact I didn't toss my heart around like other girls do, that I was strong and independent, unaffected by the perilous emotions that plagued so many, but now I was reduced to rearranging my paths to my next class just to catch a glimpse of her. I had fallen hard for the moon-eyed girl, and I never wanted to hit the ground.

The stalker-y part of me had found out more about her than I ever could glean from a conversation; she was in multiple theater groups, got a puppy last year, had multiple siblings, and so on. I had also "stalked" her boyfriend and found out a little bit about him. He was already in college so, thankfully, I didn't have to deal with "competition" directly.

My mental stability wasn't the best I'll admit. In my own twisted way I saw myself as sort of her soulmate, someone who would always wait and be there for her. Someone who would sweep her off her feet and live happily with her forever or protect her from any evil that should befall her, and I most defiantly would, if I ever got that close to her.

She only saw me as a lowerclassmen who was somewhat nice and nothing more. The subtle rejection didn't deter me, though. It only made me want her more. I wanted so bad to hold her for only a little while, to feel her gentle touch against my skin, to be the subject of her loving gaze, but, alas, I know it will never come to pass, only my daydreams keep the unrealistic fantasy alive.