all this time
i drank you
like you were the cure
when maybe you were the
poison
I returned with guilt. He repeatedly asked what was wrong. i couldn't tell him.
i couldn't tell him that it was over. i couldn't say i wasnt faithful to him. i didn't have feelings for him anymore. he held me back clearly, and it was no longer healthy for me to be with him.
so i suffered many more ill love you forevers. I heard his pleas for me to be with him forever, and i heard his plans for our unrealistic future.
i held onto my secret for another month. only to find myself asking for a break.
"a break from us" i told him, "i need some time to think"
So i met some more guys. i partied my heart out. No i didn't kiss anyone else, not even held hands during this break.
I had to end it. i knew it, everyone knew it.
Cole pleaded with me to end it, promising me a better relationship. I told him everything. crying to him in his two door mustang that i admit was super ugly.
he was my best friend while i had no one. i didn't feel for him like that. he was there for me when i needed it, and i'm thankful for him.
So it was over. he wasn't home for me to tell him. i called him, which he didn't answer. i left him messages. and i couldn't reach him for a week. so i told him over text
it was blur. i felt confident at first. I'd be okay. i had new friends.
