serendipitous

9

it's invisible

the anguish in me. 

the turmoil within me. 

i'm invisible.

just another girl

walking down the hallway. 

it's invisible.

what's happening inside me. 

you don't see it, do you?

just a hard plastic shell. 

shielding you from the hell inside me. 

but really, that isn't me. 

you think she's perfect

my perfect little girl. 

but really & truly,

 i'm sorry to disappoint. 

you don't see it. 

you don't see me.

holding back this 

monster

catastrophe

disaster

and everything in between.

look at me. 

look at this monster.

a disgrace to your perfect little suburbia.

my tendons and joints and rock-hard bones are

twisted and broken

creaking and rusted

tired and aching

as they grind themselves to dust

day after day

night after night

you can't see the earthquakes that shatter me like glass. 

you can't see the howling winds ripping my paper-thin lungs apart. 

you can't see the tornados and the hurricanes swirling inside me

leaving me flustered; confused

not knowing which way is left or right. 

you can't see the thunderstorms in my chest

those cumulonimbus clouds rolling in hard and fast

like those erratic emotions of mine.

look at me.

do you see this?

i'm drowning.

i'm drowning in the ocean of these wretched tears of mine. 

look at me.

look at all of this. 

maybe you can see this 

maybe you can't.

i 

am 

f a

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li                        

ng 

                 a 

par                                        

t.