And That's How It Happened

Chapter 18 | Day 36-38 | People Change

Song of the Chapter: Arms by Christina Perri

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After my third therapy session since I've woken up, I walk back to my room, feeling completely fine. They did a great job and I've been doing well, but I still have to stay here until the end of the week to monitor anything. Hotshot's refused to leave my room since I've woken up, and, unsurprisingly, I find him there when I wake up.

"Hey, how was your session?" he asks, immediately coming out of his chair to help me to my bed.

"Good. There's nothing wrong, like the last two."

"They're just trying to help."

"I know, I'm just restless. Therapy sessions are the most fun part of my day."

He smiles sympathetically and says, "I have something for you."

My eyes widen in surprise and he stands up.

"Hopefully the last time it gets taken off," he says, reaching behind me to clasp my crystal necklace.

I smile at him and finger the crystal.

"And, I know you've missed these."

He produces my glasses and I feel my grin get bigger. Slipping them on, I feel the cool metal against my face as my vision clears considerably better.

"Can you see well without them?"

"Not really. I'm near sighted, so I can't see things far away, but I stumble through."

"Since when did you want to be a doctor?"

"Since forever. I've always wanted to help people."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"You never asked," I shrug.

We sit in silence for a while until he breaks it.

"Do you trust me?"

Taken aback, I pause for a second before answering.

"I do trust you."

"Why won't you tell me?"

I know what he's talking about. The absence of a father figure from my life, why I can't trust people, and when I do, I don't trust that much, why I can't let him drive me around, why I'm so afraid.

"I-I...don't know."

"Will you ever?"

I don't respond.

"Is this worth it?"

I blink at him.

"This thing that we have. Whatever it is, will you ever believe in it?"

I don't respond.

"I don't want to force you to tell me, but will you ever? I like you, Baby Doll. But is it worth pursuing you if you'll never trust me?"

I feel tears start to gather in my eyes.

Will I ever trust him?

I don't know.

Can I?

Of course you can! He's proven it to you! What else does he need?

I need to know if he's going to leave! I can't get hurt again!

You're just afraid of what you're feeling. You really like him and you don't know if he's going to leave you, so you push him away. He's going to get tired. He already did. Look what's happening. You're the one hurting him. Not the other way around.