to be honest, i want to tear open my stomach. i want to rip at all the fat
i want to break myself until theres nothing left
and there isnt much to begin with
maybe burning my skin in the shower
maybe taking the razor blade that i stole from my friends house
maybe
maybe if i cut it wont hurt
but it isnt hurting
i dont know what its doing
it says hes online steam
and like
ive been trying to talk to him trying to feel him trying to feel safe and he hasnt responded so what do i do
is he ignoring me
whats going on
i dont know but i want to hurt myself
can i hurt myself
he cant tell me not to
he cant make me stop
he cant save me from myself
and i never wanted him to in the first place
i knew and still know hed never be able to
its not that i dont believe in him
its just that i know
i know.
im on my period and it makes things harder.
it makes every hour annoying and i have to hide in the bathroom, disrupting class to make sure i dont bleed through my pants
i dont know
i dont know
i dont kno w idont know i dont know i dont know i dont know
what is going on
i do nt know
i want to cut please someone please
i cant handle it anymore
im just going to scratch my stomach til i dont need to anymore
YOU ARE READING
to be honest
Poesíato be honest is a book based on my life, what is going on, how my mind works, how I'm feeling, and basically all of the in between. Some areas may be made-up, or simply not explained enough to be understood.
