Newborn
"She isn't mine! She has dark hair, and brown eyes for Christ's sake! If she was mine she would have blond hair blue eyes!" He screamed at my mom.
"You cheated! You fucking cheated on me! How dare you! You are married to me, to me GOD DAMMIT!" He again screamed.
My mother pleading him to stop, saying that she hadn't cheated. That she was faithful. That she way loyal, that she could never cheat, even on him.
***
This day effected my entire life. The day my father claimed I wasn't his, simply because I had brown hair and my brown eyes. He hated me. He cherished my sister. My sister, his little blond haired blue eyed wonder, was only three years older, but she was more important than I was. He had made sure I knew that. He always bough her the tings that I wanted, knowing I wanted them. I wasn't allowed to touch her toys. I wasn't even allowed to think about them. She could play with my toys whenever, but I couldn't even touch anything besides my run down baby doll.
Though I didn't realize it then, I realize it now. I never really cared, considering I had my younger sister. She was just as underappreciated as me. Her brown hair and brown eyes replicated mine. She even looked like me. She didn't deserve it. Neither did I, but because Hawa was older, and looked more like his child, she was more privileged.
Now, my mother babies her. She is the 'baby' of the family, but she isn't a child anymore. Hawa, being the oldest, is given special treatment, because 'she has had her fair share'. Me, I'm stuck right in the middle. It's unbearable. I feel like I am not payed attention to and when I am, it's because I am hurt, or forcing them to give me some kind attention. Don't think of me as an attention whore, but when you have as many siblings as I have, you have to out do others in order to be noticed or even not compared to another sibling.
