Lovin you

Chapter One

People say that you only need a little hope to have a relationship and all that it needs is two people willing to live, love and die for each other. Well I can tell you right now that sometimes you may doubt yourself, but as I like to say everything will turn out better then you think it will.

"Today was a brand new day" I thought to myself as I stumble down the stairs waiting for my life to become more stressful as it already is!! My parents want me to, as they like to say it " find someone" but really I don't feel like it, I mean who would love THIS!!!! I'm ugly, fat, and not worth anyone's time... No one knows what goes on inside my head. If you were living in there you would realise why I hate the word... Love!!! Everyone always says to me " you're beautiful" or " you will be loved soon...trust me" I nod my head in silence and disappointment, they all like to believe that they are right, but inside I bet they all think that I am really just... Unloveable.

Why me, why does everything bad always happen to me. No one cares about my feelings towards someone and even if they did they would never understand on why I never tell him. When I think of telling him how I feel I always end up thinking of...him!! His pure blonde hair and big blue eyes, he was the best friend i have ever had or even known. He understood me, cared for me. I though I had it all, until one little girl decided to tell him a lie!!

My heart broke into two when he started acting strange towards me.. What had I done?? Eventually I found out the whole thing, and when I did I was destroyed, it felt as if my heart was being ripped out of my chest and being locked up into a safe that everyone was gonna toy around with. From that day on I vowed to never tell anyone the truth of how I feel. Because I was always so scared on how their reaction would turn out. Would they be happy or would they leave me... Shattered?

I couldn't take it anymore I had, had enough, all of these memories came rushing to my head filling my brain with grief, so the only thing I could think of was to run, run away from all of this.. But you can never run away from your thoughts. As I ran, I ran into this little boy we both topple over one another then slowly pick our selves up off of the ground. "WATCH WHERE YOUR GOING KID" I scream at the top of my lungs trying to keep the tears held back. He faces me and our eyes met.. Boy was his eyes so.. So... Amazing!!!

He had these big blue eyes and long curly hair. I could feel my cheeks burning up and I knew then I had to stop them from doing that so I quickly dashed passed him and kept on running I could hear my voice echoing, screaming at me. I always get those voices coming to me, even if I didn't want them to. The only picture that kept flashing through my eyes was his face, how his eyes were perfectly alined with his smile, even if I haven't seen him smile. I don't know why I kept thinking of him could it be true was I.... In love???