Misbegotten

Twenty-Three

Florence was giving my father the silent treatment. The drive home last night was excruciatingly tense, even by the usual standards. I knew when I woke up this morning and the house was quiet, that things weren't any better. Despite everything, I couldn't help but feel a little guilty. It wasn't a lie that I had asked my father to tell, it was something he did himself. But that trip to Tahiti ended up being a kind of catalyst for me. It was a turning point. Some turns into the right directions, others not so much, but nevertheless, it was an important experience. And he gave that to me. 

I searched around my room for my laptop, before plopping down on my bed and opening it up. I pulled up the email from the second apartment I had looked at. The one that would be ready before university started; I actually could move out in a fortnight. wouldn't let this turning point fizz out and fade into nothingness. I had to make it mean something, and although I was scared, I knew now more than ever that it was the right choice.

I hit reply and accepted.

*

"Hey, Sofia?" Chelsea's voice sailed through my bedroom door.

"Yeah, come in," I called back, not looking up from my laptop. I was elbow deep in paperwork. Who knew leasing an apartment would involve so much of the stuff. I had written my name so many times it had started to look foreign and ridiculous. 

"You've been locked in here all morning, I just wanted to make sure you were okay," she said, sitting on the edge of my bed. She gave me a nervous glance before looking back down at her hands.

"Yeah, why?" I sat up straight, raising my hands over my head and stretching my back.

"Mum and dad are still fighting," she sighed.

"I'm sorry."

"No, I didn't mean that it was your fault," she said with urgency.

"I know," I raised my arms in surrender. "I just meant that I'm sorry they're fighting. They'll be okay. They've survived worse."

She looked at me with a sad smile, but I knew she agreed.

"But hey, I have some good news," I changed the subject. "I accepted the apartment. Just dying in the paperwork now."

"Seriously? That's amazing." Her face broke out in a toothy grin. "Well not the dying part, but still."

"Yeah. And, thank you."

"What for?" Chelsea raised an eyebrow.

"For helping me, with the apartments, and just with everything since we've been back."

She nodded, her grin faltering making me stop from looking back to my work.

 "I can't help but wonder what life would've been like if we'd just taken the chance to get to know each other, without all the shit attached earlier. We could've been good friends," she said after a moment.

"Yeah." 

The thought had crossed my mind a few times too. But if there's anything I learnt, it's that there is no use in wishing for the past to change, because it can't. No matter how hard you wish and wish and wish. It won't change for anyone.

"But hey, we've got time now right?" Chelsea said.

"Yeah, we do," I smiled.

"Now, do you want help with the paperwork?"

"Yes please, there's so much," I groaned. Chelsea scooted further up my bed and took my laptop from me. She scanned the paperwork, nodding her head.