black.

chapter two

“I’m going to the gym, do you need anything while I’m out?” I asked my dad who sat lifelessly on at the kitchen table drinking his everyday cup of black coffee.

“No, don’t stay out to late. Ok?” I gave him a nod before exiting the door

The gym was always my escape. It made me feel relaxed and at ease. Whenever I’m angry I come here and let out all of my anger, when I’m sad I come and walk all of my depression out on the treadmill and most importantly at times like these when I just need a talk, I come to sit down with my personal trainer.

“Hey, I’m looking for Sandy.” I stepped into the office that my tattooed trainer would normally be in but I was surprised when I was welcomed by a guy with damp hair stuck to his forehead.

“She has pneumonia.” He frowned “But, I’m her brother if that helps and I’ll be taking her spot until she gets better.” He stood from the desk that he was sitting at standing to his feet so that he could give me a proper greeting

“I’m Harry, and you are?” His arm was still extended waiting for me to shake his hand but, my eyes were focused on his sweaty tanned skin.

“I-I’m sorry, I was really hoping that Sandy would be here.” I grabbed my bag that I placed on the floor before I quietly exited from the office.

I heard Sandy’s brother shout something to me but, I couldn’t understand due to all of the loud workout machines sounding over his voice. Since my plans were canceled I had nothing better to do than go to the ice cream shop down the street to have a bite of depression food. Honestly, I wasn’t depressed I was just tired. Tired of having to constantly push my dad to have a full conversation with me, and tired of having to be ignored in my own home. All I wanted was for things to go back to when my dad would come home from his long days at work and burst into my room with a new stuffed animal that I could lay beside me on my bed. I remember each night he would allow me to pick which stuffed animal I wanted to help him read the story. Each night I would choose the same white bear with a red bow tie, mainly because it was the biggest and it reminded me of my dad. I named him Mr.Daddy because when my dad would have late nights at work I would sit him in front of my bed and he would protect me from all of the monsters that tried to attack me in my sleep. I know, it’s cheesy but I thought highly of my dad. He was the only man in this world that ever mattered to me and even still to this day he is. Through all of his down days I still have hope that one day he will go back to how he use to be.

“I’ll have one of what she’s having” I looked up noticing the same guy from the gym. Only this time he was wearing much more clothing although the sleeves from his plaid flannel was tied around his dripping wet hair and the shorts he had on were barely covering his legs.

“Are you following me?” I asked turning to face my fitness trainers brother.

“I’m not allowed to get ice cream?” He asked making a point that I had no response to.

As I sat down at the empty seat in the corner I couldn’t help but, stare at Sandy’s brother who was only a table in front of me. His skin was tan, and his arms were buff. His damp hair was drying and it begin his fold into brown curls. I studied him as he licked the remainder of his spoon and I for a second I had to remind myself where I was. Sandy is hot, but I would never imagine that this guy in front of me could be her brother. He’s much more, settle than her his accent is also thicker. Sandy’s accent only comes out if your paying a lot of attention to what she’s saying. What doesn’t surprise me is the amount of tattoos he has, Sandy’s body is covered in them, along with piercing and her jet black hair brings them out even more.

“I hope you enjoyed the show.” He winked at me before standing from his seat and exiting the ice cream shop. I felt my face burn red and I was more embarrassed than I should have been. I quickly finished my ice cream and began to make my way home.

When I entered my house my dad was passed out on the sofa with an old photo book laying across his chest. I tried to ease it off of him but his grip around the book was to tight. I could tell that it was old because of the old vintage cover on the book.

“What are you doing?” I jumped as my dad’s eyes opened as soon as I tried to move his arm from around the book.

“I just wanted to know what you were looking at.” My answer was simple, probably because I couldn’t think of a fast enough lie.

“Your just like your mom.” He laughed as he raised off of the couch setting the book on the table. “Always snooping your little nose into someone else's business.”

“No, no. I was just curious.” I stammered thinking of how dumb I probably sounded.

When he stood to his feet I got nervous at how tall he was standing over me. His tongue swiped against his top row of teeth before he let out a silent laughter that only he and I could hear.

“Sit down.” He commanded and I did as he said only because I have been yearning for attention from my father for months.

“Look at you.” He gestured his hands to my body that sat still on the recliner with my gym attire still on. “All grown up, looking just like your mother.” He’s still laughing through every word and for a second I thought maybe I was missing a joke that he was telling.

“Please.” I stopped him throwing my hands up not wanting to hear anymore. As much as I miss my mother he was the last person that I wanted to hear speak about her. After all of the years I’ve finally come to realization that she’s gone and as much as I didn’t want to believe it my dad took her from me.

“Listen to me.” When my dad pushed me back on the couch, for a second I felt what my mom was feeling for the ten years of their marriage. Fear.