Only One Day More

iv. It's Time

Ant opened his eyes and smiled when he saw a lightly snoring Dec laying on his chest. He had insisted on sleeping for a couple of hours, although there wasn't a lot of time anymore. Ant had always wanted to take Dec in his arms and to watch his face while he was sleeping. He always had wanted to wake up to this very scene. Ant felt the butterflies come alive in his stomach. He planted a kiss on Dec's forehead. Dec whimpered and opened his eyes. A smile appeared on his face. He didn't say anything but kissed Ant softly on his mouth.

The kiss heated up quite quickly; tongues fighting for dominance. Dec let Ant win, enjoying the sensation the kiss gave him. He straddled Ant and looked him in the eyes. They didn't have to say anything; they just knew what the other one was thinking. They needed each other.

Ant pulled Dec down, kissing his lips forcefully. He shivered as Dec's hands disappeared under his shirt. Ant hummed softly, enjoying the feeling of Dec's lips on his and the feeling of Dec's hands on his stomach. Ant was desperate to taste Dec's skin, wanting to discover every part of Dec's body he hadn't touched yet. Ant took the lead and made Dec lay down, leaving him on top.

Ant took his own shirt off and helped Dec out of his. For a moment, the two men looked each other in the eyes. This was really gonna happen. They would make love to each other for the first – and also the last – time. This was a moment they both had looked forward to for a long time. Ant kissed Dec tenderly. "Let's take it slow, I want to enjoy every second." Ant whispered. Dec smiled and kissed Ant. "Sounds perfect." He answered.

Both of the guys were breathing heavily. For the last hour, Ant hadn't thought about today being his last day at all; Dec had let him forget every sorrow he had ever had. "That was so much better than I'd ever imagined." Dec admitted as he kissed his boyfriend. "Why didn't I realise earlier that I love you?" Ant asked. Dec kissed him. "It's better you realise it now than if you wouldn't have realised it at all. Now you're mine and I'll have the memory of you and me forever." Dec said. "You're my everything, Ant. You're my best friend, you're the one I want to share everything with, the one I have shared everything with." Dec positioned him better so he could watch Ant in the eyes. "Everything from Byker over PJ & Duncan, SM:TV, Pop Idols, I'm A Celeb, Saturday Night Takeaway and Britain's Got Talent. No one will ever know how it feels to share that all with someone like you. We shared all those excitements, disappointments, failed TV shows, award shows,... I'm so happy I shared all my life with you." Dec said. Ant felt a tear rolling down his cheek. Dec cupped Ant's face and kissed him. "And I'm so happy we shared that last part of us now." He whispered. Ant didn't say anything but kissed Dec passionately, ready for round two.

If you had asked Ant one week earlier what he would do the last day of his life, he wouldn't have answered that he would spend the day in bed with his best friend; but he couldn't wish for a better way to spend the last hours.

There was only one hour left. The boys' mothers and Ant's sisters were in Dec's house. "Where is Lisa?" Christine asked, holding her son in her arms. "I don't think she'll come." Ant said carefully. "Didn't you spend the last day with her?" Sarha asked. Ant looked Dec in the eyes. Suddenly, the doorbell rang. Dec opened the door. "I'm sorry, I really had to say goodbye." Lisa said. Dec hugged her. "Come in, love." He said. "Why would you say sorry for saying goodbye to your husband?" Christine asked. "Because I spent my last day with Dec and not with Lisa." Ant answered. A sudden silence filled the room. "I love him, I love Dec, mum, I'm in love with Dec." Ant admitted and he cried. Christine cuddled him. "It's okay, love. It's not a surprise really." She said. Dec hugged his own mum. "I'm sorry, mum." He whispered. She kissed his temple. "Don't be." She said. "Come on boys, comfort each other." Christine said with a weak smile.

For the next hour, the boys didn't let go of each other for even a minute. The radio was on and played some lame love song. "I did my speech earlier today," Dec said. Ant's family looked at it from a distance. "But I'm so proud of you. I'm so proud of what we did together. I couldn't wish for a better friend than you, I couldn't wish for a better work partner than you and most of all: I love you." Dec whispered as he started to cry. "I love you so much." "Dec, you can't imagine how happy it made me to be with you all my life. 28 years of friendship, 28 years and we had only two fights." Ant chuckled when he thought about the last fight, only one day ago. "Thank you for making my day, every day of my life. Thank you for being there for me every day, thank you for being you." Ant said and he kissed Dec lovingly. "Just one more minute." Dec said, swallowing his tears. "It's time." Ant said. "I love you." Dec whispered. "I love you too." Ant said and he kissed his boyfriend one last time.

Ant broke off the kiss and closed his eyes. He took in the warmth of Dec's arms.

He was ready to die.