I think god just really really decided to slap me in the face with this one. I do not know how to function when someone looks at me. It's just a bunch of incoherent screaming and alarms in my head. Like the spongebob episode, where all his mini boys in his mind flip the fuck out and throw papers everywhere. That's me. Hang in there mini mes. It's like my brain melts and slides down my throat so all that comes out is strange muffled sounds. Like how do you start conversations with people? Just walk up to them and say hi? (Don't even tell me "yes, that's exactly how". I know but I refuse to do it. I rather lay on a bed of nails while people slowly put rocks on my body. Talk about body piercings.) that's just strange. I like to think I'm quite confident, so it not really a problem of "hey, they're not gonna talk to you cause you're ugly", it's more like "hey, walking up to people and talking them out of no where is creepy, don't do that." BUT HOW ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO DO IT? I DON'T KNOW. My lord and savior, Jesus Christ, please help me get laid. that was a joke. A bad one? Yes. Are you still going to keep reading though? Hopefully. Like do I just walk up to them and say "nice... shirt." (I genuinely struggled to find something that everyone would have on. Because shirts and pants don't exist in my head apparently.) I had someone walk up to and say "look at that tree, isn't it cool?" . Best conversation ever had. So I guess what I'm trying to say is. I can't talk and you should compliment trees more. They work hard so you can breather, damn it.
YOU ARE READING
Reasons why I don't like dating; and why I plan on staying alone
RomanceThis is the journey of an illiterate, short-tempered, high schooler, who's trying to tell you why she believes love is a sham and that she's slowly becoming a fire hydrant. Love is hard for fire hydrants. Be kind to us.
