the library | meanie

13

wonwoo broke down crying. he couldn't hold himself anymore and he assured himself that it was okay, for now, in front of mingyu.

mingyu came rushing closer and embraced him. even though wonwoo wanted him gone or not, he cared for him, and wanted everything for him to be happy.

"i hate myself, mingyu," wonwoo muted said through sobs. mingyu didn't say anything, cause he knew by experience nothing helped to say to wonwoo for now.

"i hate that i'm treating you like this, i hate that i like you, i hate that i want to make my family proud, i hate-," wonwoo said before sobs engulfed him so he couldn't talk. 

mingyu just gently stroke over his back. he thought about what wonwoo just said. he now knew that wonwoo liked him, but it made him sad that he hated himself so much.  maybe it hurted a little that wonwoo hated that he liked him, but he understood.

"i once hated myself for liking you," mingyu suddenly said. wonwoo looked up and into his eyes. "i hated myself so much when i found out that i was gay," mingyu kept going. 

"but then i was thinking, why should i hate something who will always be a part of me? why should i hate something that is so right for me?" 

wonwoo just stared empty at him, he had stopped crying. "but what about your parents, aren't they disappointed, or in shame of you?" he asked. mingyu shook his head. 

"i haven't told them yet, the only ones that know are seokmin and my little sister. "but when they eventually get to know, when i'm ready to tell them, i hope they will love me as they have before," mingyu said and smiled.

"but if not...they love you as before?" wonwoo asked, still with a sad frown he looked curious and amused by the younger ones answers. "then it's their problem and not something i should hate myself for," mingyu answered.

"hey, you have stopped crying," mingyu almost sang when he noticed wonwoo who had in fact stopped crying and now was fumbled in his thoughts. 

he smiled of mingyu trying to lift the mood. "and you're smiling now too, what a miracle!" mingyu said and smiled too. 

wonwoo started to laugh a little bit. "and now your laughing too....you must like me very much," mingyu said and leaned his forehead against wonwoo's.

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a little christmas present for you guys :) but yeh i just felt inspired so i just wrote a short part for you to read. 

but i have a question for you guys too, i was wondering where you are from? i'm curious!