Falling in love with my bully (C.D)

Chapter 9

Donica's POV:

"Wow"

"Yeah...wow"

That was the most exhilarating kiss of my entire life

Well actually the only kiss of my entire life but that's not the point

There was so much I felt all in one simple small kiss and I don't know if I should love it or feel...

Scared

I look up slowly at Cameron with wide eyes and see him grinning down at me

"You don't know how long I've been waiting to do that"

I see him start to lean in for another kiss

I start panicking and quickly pull away leaving him confused his grin slowly starting to disappear

"What's wrong?"

I breathed a shaky breath

"I-I think you should go"  I suggest

"What?"

"I need to finish this project and don't worry I'll do all the work and put your name it to"

I said while starting to grab the supplies I will need

"What? You just can't ignore what just happened right now"

I ignored him and continued looking for everything

"Donica please"

Once again I ignored him

"Donica look at me"

I can't

"Donica!"

He said while turning me to face him unexpectedly

"What Cameron! I told you im busy so leave!"

"You can't just ignore that we kissed!"

"Well maybe we shouldn't have in the first place!"

I said while yanking my hands away

He looked at me almost scared to talk

"W-What are you saying?"

I take a deep shaky breath knowing my next words are about to kill him

"It was a mistake ok! It should of never happened"

I regretted it as soon as I said it

Cameron's face showed all types of hurt and dissapointed writen across his face

"You don't really mean that do you"

I didn't say anything back

"Donica"

He said grabbing me by the shoulders

I don't say anything while just keeping my head down and avoiding all eye contact

"Please answer me"

"Yes Cameron I meant it!"

I said finally lifting my head to look at him

I slowly pull his hands away

"Im sorry Cameron but I didn't feel anything we were just caught up in the moment that's all that happened!"

"Donica please don't say that"

"You honestly can't say you didn't feel anything!"

I let out a shaky breath and slowly turned to look him in his eyes

"Im sorry Cameron I didn't feel anything"

Such a big lie because I definitely felt something and it felt very strong

"No Donica please just admit it"

He said with tears pooling in his eyes

It hurt seeing him like that

I looked away

He lowered his head

"I love you Donica I can't lose you anymore please give me a chance!"

Those tears where now running down his face

My fingers ached to wipe them away from his perfect face and to tell him that yes I wanted to be his

Because I think I actually love him back...

But I can't get hurt anymore especially not by Cameron again

"Leave Cameron"

"It can never work out between us your just the bully and im just the bullied that's all that were ever going to be"

Tears where coming down my own face now

He reached his hand to try to wipe away my tears but I turned away from him before he could reach me

He put his hand down and sighed

He started walking out but stopped at the doorway

"I will never give up on you I will try day and night to get you I will not stop until I can rightfully get to call you my girlfriend"

He started walking down the stairs

I so badly wanted to run after him and stop him but instead I stayed still watching him walk away

I watched the boy I love walk away from me

"Goodbye Cameron"

I whispered

As I watched him walk out into the night

I ran to my bathroom

I collapsed on the floor in a pool of my own tears

They won't stop coming it was like all of the other times I had cried where just preparing me for this never ending waterfall

I reach under my sink and grab my box containing all my blades and reaches for the sharpest one I owned

I slowly put it up to my skin and positioned it on my scar covered wrist

"Im sorry Cameron"
was the last thing I said before passing out.

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This is probably my shortest chapter I have written but my writers block is at its worst right now! welp yeah left y'all with cliffhanger there dont hate me! Amd OMG were almost at 600 reads! I know it doesnt seem like alot but to me it is thank you guys sooo much i am so grateful for all of yall!!!
I have a question though which is totally random but i just wanna know
What is your favorite tv show?
Told ya it was random
But my favorite shows are Glee and The Flash
Well this has been long enough byee
~Ky <3