Dreams

Chapter 14

The one person who I really, actually consider to be a friend lives thousands of miles away, on the other side of the country. He's a family friend, we call him my cousin, but technically he's not. I don't think he's even related to me at all, something confusing about friends of my parents and divorce...I'm not sure the details. But I've always known him, as long as I can remember.

His name is Evan, and he's a few years older than me. He shares an apartment in California with a friend of his, working and trying to pay his way though college bit by bit. We've hardly seen him since he moved away from his dad's house, but we usually keep in touch through email a lot. I've told him things no one else knows. He knows more about my hobbies and pasttimes than anyone, and he knows how I actually feel about my school entourage. He gives me advice. I listen to his woes about college and life and girls.

But lately, he's been getting worse and worse about staying in touch. His emails are few and far between, and when they come they're mostly apologies for not writing sooner and brief comments about his classes. I felt that I was slipping farther and farther from his life, becoming less and less important.

I dreaded opening my email, dreaded the moment when I would have to accept that yet again he had not responded. But nonetheless, it had to be faced eventually.

I was sitting on my bed, holed up with the curtains all closed and as few lights on as possible. It was that kind of day, where you just curl deep into the pillows and cushions on your bed and think or work on things or just lie there blank.

It had to be done. Slowly, very slowly, I opened my laptop and signed into my email, already preparing myself for disappointment but--

There was an email.

Dear Mare,

I'm so sorry that I haven't written more.

Ugh, again. I was so frustrated I almost didn't want to read it. I almost closed my laptop right there.