I can't help but think about how bad both of these so called "lovers" hurt me. But in the end, I'm not the one that's struggling with finding love. They are! And for the one that I've known the longest, he's definitely changed on me. It's funny how when you start dating someone, they're sweet and charming and they treat you like a fucking Queen. But when you don't give them what they want then it's all bad . How can you say you love someone so much, yet hurt them so bad? But anyways let me tell you how I met both of these guys! Guy #1 (I'll just call him Mr Wrong throughout the rest of the book) hurt me in the worst way possible though. When we first met, we were just friends..I was cool, he was cool . A few months later we had gotten a lot closer, not having sex, no lol not in that type of way. I mean it is possible to be just friends with a guy. But yeah, we were good . A few months after that, things started going wrong. His hoes were constantly coming at me with bullshit ass drama, adding me on Facebook just to see who I talk to and what I talk about. Shit was annoying so I confronted him about it. This nigga claimed he wasn't fucking with none of those hoes but I highly doubted that . Even when we did decide to take our friendship to the next level I was hesitant at first because of all the things I had witnessed just by us being not friends, but Bestfriends. But I was willing to take that chance with him because I felt like I already knew him and we'd established that bond already . So we started dating and everything was good, actually great in the beginning. I loved him so much and I pretty much did anything for him . Fast forward to about 6 months later, shit was all bad . I was so tired of hearing from other people about him fucking around with other bitches. Don't get me wrong, I trusted him. I mean it's kinda hard to be in a relationship with someone who's famous when there's groupies everywhere you look riding his dick . Every relationship has to have TRUST. But to even be able to deal with that type of relationship you gotta be willing to ride for your lover. Not letting these hoes get to you, telling you what they gone do with your man while he's out clubbing and shit, touring, staying in hotels.. Nah I was far from worried . Bitches are so quick to point out what they see wrong in your relationship, yet they don't have one to even discuss. One thing I do hate is a shady ass bitch and it was that day that I found out my boyfriend was messing around with someone that I not only knew, but considered a friend . I'll let her remain nameless since she's irrelevant to this story and to me. Whenever I was mad as hell and wouldn't speak to this nigga though, it was obvious he was getting what I wasn't giving him from someone else. That's that shit I don't like...if I'm not pleasuring you it's for a damn good reason. I love dick just as much as the next chick but when you start doing me wrong and I find out about it, that's over. So since he wanted to play me, I was gonna do the same.
The whole time while he's fucking around with the next bitch, what he didn't know was that his "homie" was tryna fuck with me too. I know y'all thinking, "Dri smashed the homie" not at all. You can be a bitch that get what you want without being a hoe! So I was talking to his homie but we weren't fucking or anything. And if he found out I didn't give a fuck! I just wanted him to feel and understand how I felt .
When we broke up, I felt depressed as hell though I won't lie. It's not because I'd lost a boyfriend, but when we went our separate ways our bestfriend relationship was ruined as well. He started saying shit to me I'd never heard his ass say before; I'm sure he didn't mean it, he was just really hurt. But I was hurt too & he kept saying to me that I only care about myself, truth is I was always lowkey hurting.. But no one ever saw that side of me. I mean when you make pain look this good it never wears out.. Hell I'd been in tears for years crying over niggas so I wasn't gonna let him take my pride and joy with him once he left.
I guess to prove how committed he was, he wanted to propose to me. I turned him down. Wanna know why? Because I know he's not ready for marriage, I knew he had sideline hoes, and three you don't just propose to someone to stop them from being with someone else. He wanted to be engaged for all the wrong reasons. Pathetic ass nigga! At the end of the day I just know that I loved him and he mistreated me on several occasions, but the worst part is he made me look like a complete dumbass for believing his lies over and over again . I lost the only guy I've ever really trusted and I thought he'd be different but I guess I was lying to myself when I said that. But you never really know how evil and selfish a person can really be towards you until you get on their bad side . I'm just like every other dumbass woman who fell for him, crying myself to sleep at night with a broken heart while he's just doing his thing, not even caring. And he's always claiming "Baby ima love you forever" . But it's funny how you trust niggas.
