e.

overwhelmed

my life is a constant spiral of boredom,
there is no end to the bleakness,
no break from the blandness,
i crave something more than this.

my imagination does not help,
in my mind I can soar on the wings of an eagle,
in my mind anything is possible,
in reality I am nothing more than a slowly deteriorating person.

i am overwhelmed with boredom,
it is slowly killing me,
it holds a knife near my throat yet refuses to slit it,
watching as I slowly waste away.

i'm terrified of amounting to nothing,
that this life will have been useless,
that I won't do anything,
so I hide away from it all behind a screen.

leaving the house is a foreign idea,
seeing friends is a distant memory,
anxiety builds inside me like magma,
and life continues around me like I'm not there.

***

Again, not my greatest but I felt the need to get these feelings out of me. Recently I've been feeling like my life is super dull, and I want to change that yet I don't quite know how.

e.